


poetry in your body (you got it in every way)

by bckwrds101



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Cheryl is a ballerina, F/F, Toni is a contemporary dancer, repost of the dancer au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-06
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2020-08-10 16:44:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 35,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20138686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bckwrds101/pseuds/bckwrds101
Summary: In which Cheryl is a classical ballerina who can't really appreciate the contemporary style, especially not when she's the one dancing it;and Toni is a contemporary dancer who sees the beauty in everything, but can't dance classical ballet to save her own life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, there.  
omg this is awkward haha  
well, as you can see, this is a repost of the dancer au - a rewrite as well. :) I won't change the first few chapters much, but the last ones will be different from what I had previously posted. Since I need time to reread and choose whatever I'm going to change, the updates will be weekly, for now :)
> 
> Hope you like it :)
> 
> You can find me on twitter @bckwrds101

It was ten to eight in the morning when Cheryl arrived at her dance studio. Most teenagers were on their way to school that time, but the benefits of being homeschooled allowed her to go to the studio whenever she wanted and leave whenever she felt too tired to rehearse the variation one more time. So, meaning to practice before the classrooms were full of young undedicated dancers, as well as take her private classes of the day, she always arrived early.

‘It requires perfection, Cheryl.’ Her mother used to remind her when she was just a young child, barely six years old. Now, almost ten years later, the girl hardly needed reminders. She’s well aware of how much discipline, effort and hard work being a dancer requires. Being a classical ballet dancer, on top of all, requires perfection, and she always worked hard to achieve it: from the way her tights and leotards should always be impeccable, or the way her bun can never have loose strands of hair showing, to the way she acts during her classes, rehearsals and, most importantly, on stage.

With that mindset, Cheryl walked into the studio. Her long red hair pulled back in a romantic middle parted bun, her purple leotard tightly hugging her figure, warming pants and flip-flops on. Her bag weighted on her shoulder from all she carried to her classes. Tap, jazz, ballroom and ballet shoes; sneakers, in case they had an extra hip-hop class she had to attend; her newly bought Gaynor Minden pointe, and the already broken Capezzio one for late rehearsals; two extra leotards and tights; a top and matching shorts; granola bars and fresh fruits, that, unhealthily, were basically her only feeding source; school materials, to take a look between her jazz and contemporary classes; hygiene products, of course; and, clearly, all important dance supplies, like a theraband, a turning board and a foot stretcher.

The receptionist, Katy, offered her a friendly smile and a cheerful “Good morning, Cheryl.”, even though she knew no answers would come back to her. As expected, Cheryl greeted her with a soft smile and a nod. No words would leave the teenager’s mouth unless absolutely necessary and, even then, they would sound barely like a whisper. She’d been dancing since she was two years old and her coaches had yet to find out the tone of her voice.

Music already resonated from Studio B, her private’s classroom, as Cheryl walked along the halls after putting her pointe shoes on and getting ready for her class. She had finally mastered her balance for the variation she was currently practicing, Nikiya - from La Bayadere, the night before and couldn't wait to practice it inside a proper classroom, not in her bedroom, silently, while everyone else in her family slept.

When the redhead entered the room, however, she was greeted not only by her private coach, but also by another girl. Pink haired, loose T-shirt and shorts, messy bun - Cheryl almost flinched, she had never been careless like that with a bun, not even when she was only five and her mother decided not to let Thornhill employees do her hair anymore, since it was time consuming and they had other things to do -, dancing to the song she’d heard in the hallway.

Her movements, despite flawless, looked unclean in the ballerina’s eyes. Something about how unclean and discipline lacking they seemed with all that floor using and carefreeness. Surely, the pink haired girl could deliver a good contemporary performance, Cheryl knew that. The fact she couldn’t really appreciate that style of dance didn't mean she knew nothing about it, having to take classes herself at least three times a week, and privates whenever she could book some. So of course she knew the stranger danced well, according to that type of dance’s standards, the redhead was simply unable to find the beauty in it.

The song came to an end and Cheryl saw the smile reaching Miss Hearthorne's eyes as she clapped. Finding appropriate to do so, the redhead discreetly mimicked her coach’s actions, gaining the attention of the two other occupants of the room.

“Cheryl, there you are!” Miss Hearthorne kindly smiled at her. “It's time for our first private of the day, right?”

“First private of the day?” The pink haired dancer chuckled as she walked towards Cheryl alongside their trainer. “How many privates do you have on a daily basis? Four?” She joked.

The ballerina could only stare at her with her curious doe-like eyes and nod, because that was the amount of privates she did have on weekdays. Four hours of private classes, one of those hours dedicated to the style of dance the shorter girl was dancing when Cheryl arrived in the room. Contemporary wasn’t really her forte, when things were put into perspective by her coach once, not because she couldn't perform the movements or because she didn’t even like watching it or taking classes. It was solely due to the fact that she couldn't let go, couldn't bring herself to wash away all those thoughts about having to execute everything perfectly, could’t just feel the music and dance to it. And technique is obviously important in any type of dance, but only mastering that aspect might not be the most moving when it’s about the actual performance, especially when it comes to contemporary.

“Wow, girl! I admire your discipline.” The other teen commented, offering her a hand “I'm Toni. Toni Topaz.”

Topaz. Like the gem, Cheryl thought as she reached her hand and shook the one she had offered. Her heart pounded heavily in her chest at the thought of having to say her name, or anything, to the person she’d just met, she could even feel her her lungs shut off to the prospect of receiving oxygen, her sight becoming blurry as she tried to open her mouth. Deciding against replying, she pursed her lips, retrieving the hand she had previously offered.

“That's Cheryl.” Always an angel, always understanding, Miss Hearthorne said. “Cheryl Blossom. Our best ballerina.”

Toni looked at the girl up and down - tight bun, amazing posture, beautiful leotard, she's definitely got the physique - and smiled, she could absolutely picture the redhead being a great ballerina. She also noticed she hadn’t even heard the girl’s voice once, but decided not to comment on it. Shyness wasn’t something the Topaz was known for, but she would never push someone to talk if they were not comfortable with it.

“You sure look like it.” Toni commented, and she swore a small smile graced the ballerina's features for a second. “I wish I could be a good classical dancer, but I’m lacking when it comes to a lot of aspects of ballet.” Knowing Cheryl would probably not say anything, she continued talking in order to at least get a reaction like the smile from before. Nothing, only beautiful brown eyes staring at her as if drowning in the words being spoken. “I'm more of a contemporary dancer, as you saw.” She continued as the girl finally nodded. “Do you like contemporary?”

As soon as Cheryl shook her head, she realized that must have not been the polite thing to do. The thought of explaining herself went through her mind, but she couldn't just bring herself to do it on the spot, without further and previous preparation. Her eyes widened and she probably looked frightened at Miss Hearthorne, as if pleading for her to explain to Toni what she meant. Truth was, she didn’t really like contemporary, but would never say that if someone asked. The fact that the other girl hadn’t given up on talking to her when she didn't even open her mouth to voice replies for her statements made her nervous and act on pure honesty and reflex, not really on politeness and sympathy.

Before their coach could say anything, Toni let out a loud laugh, followed by a wide smile at the redhead in front of her. She looked nervous and the pink haired girl only wanted to ease her. Not everyone liked contemporary, it wasn’t something to feel guilty about.

“It's not for everyone, I guess.” Toni shrugged and saw Cheryl exhale as her face softened.

“Cheryl is really fond of perfection.” Miss Hearthorne mentioned, as if justifying the ballerina’s answer.

“I understand.” The dancer said, not looking at the teacher, but at Cheryl herself. A soft smile reassuring the redhead that no offense was taken by her answer. 

“She’s been practicing it a lot lately, though.”

Cheryl was. No matter how unable to let go she seemed to be, she tried. That’s the reason for her fourth private, it used to be only three, but when the girl realized she was getting nowhere in a classroom full of people, she thought privates could help. They did, to some extent, but Cheryl still found whatever she was doing extremely messy and imperfect, so although getting relatively better, she saw no beauty in whatever she executed.

It was hard to find the beauty in herself, sometimes, as much as it was hard to admit, but she found it even harder when dancing contemporary. The fact that there was no appreciation for that form of dance made Cheryl feel no appreciation for seeing herself dance to it, and, furthermore, made her look at the mirror in defeat, disappointment and disgust. The ballerina felt beautiful while dancing the classical variations on stage, but that was the extent of it. She had confidence in the other styles of dance, and could do an absolutely great job if put on stage to dance to them, but that wouldn't change the image she saw when looking in the mirror. An image that only became pleasant in her eyes with perfect fouettes, amazing leaps and well executed arabesques, pirouettes and penches.

“Well, I hope I can see you practice someday…” Toni said and saw the blush on Cheryl’s cheeks as the girl nodded, slightly unsure.

“That would be great!” Miss Hearthorne beamed, half excited for the fact that Toni could give Cheryl great input about her dance and half content that she didn’t seem to distance herself from the redhead after a while of not getting any words to leave her mouth. The dancers in the studio were always really nice, always trying to include Cheryl in whatever it was they were doing, even if she didn’t really talk to them. But they could only do those things to some extent before Cheryl started to feel like a burden and refused whatever invitations to go out, go to lunch or even do homework together. “I'll leave you two for a second to get the supplies I need for Cheryl’s practice.” Finding it as an opportunity to leave the girls alone to see if Cheryl would be any different with Toni than she was with anyone else - although she pretty much doubt that -, the coach walked to the door, instructing the redhead to warm-up, and left the classroom to the back room.

Cheryl, as instructed, slowly walked to the center of the classroom, not in order to ignore the girl in front of her, but to obey her teacher’s instructions. Toni didn’t really take any offense in that and only followed the girl, sitting right beside her as she started with the basic warm-ups. Even those had to be executed with perfection, the pink-haired dancer grinned while watching the other dancer.

“I'm new here.” Topaz informed, always so talkative. “Not in town, but in this studio.”

Cheryl wanted to ask where was she from in Riverdale, given the fact that Jason, her brother, knew and showed her everybody on his social media, and never mentioned a name like Toni Topaz. Toni seemed an abbreviation for something, the redhead also wanted to ask, but stopped herself when her heart started pounding fast, just like a few minutes before, and chose to only stare at the girl, waiting for her to keep talking.

“Do you like it here?”

Cheryl nodded, her focus slightly disturbed by the attention she was receiving from the other dancer. People usually gave up on talking to her after the first few minutes of dead silence.

“Are the people nice?” She nodded again. “To anyone?” With a frown, Cheryl nodded one more time, questioning Toni’s words. There was no reason for them to be mean to the new girl. “Can you keep a secret?” Cheryl, tired of nodding, only stopped her warm-up and turned to her, showing she was interested in listening to whatever Toni had to say. She wanted to open her mouth and joke saying that it’s not like she would ever tell anyone, but decided against it. “I’m from the Southside.”

‘They’re scum.’ The words proffered by her mother invaded Cheryl’s head. But one look at the girl in front of her and she realized her mother could be wrong. There was no way someone like Toni Topaz would be scum. She was nice, attentive and even pretty, the thought of Penelope, her mother, calling her that was absurd.

“Only Miss Hearthorne knows.” Toni sighed, keeping it a secret wasn’t something she was proud of, but that was her only opportunity to dance in those rich kids’ studio and she wasn't about to mess that up. “And now you. Which is silly, because you’re the first person I met and I’m already rambling about my upbringing that was supposed to be a secret. You’ll keep this secret, right?”

Cheryl thought her head would hurt from how forcefully she nodded that time. Toni could trust her, and it wasn’t because Cheryl didn’t talk to anyone - to be fair, she talked to her brother loud and clear, and to her mother and father when they talked to her, which was probably once a month -, but because Toni seemed kind and talented, no matter how much Cheryl disliked contemporary, and the kids in the studio were not even the problem, but their wealthy, proud and arrogant parents were. With a snap of their fingers, they could make someone lose an incredible opportunity just for the sake of their prejudice and Cheryl would never let that happen, no matter what her mother said.

“Thank you, Cheryl.” Toni’s smile made Cheryl smile back and pride filled the contemporary dancer's heart with that small accomplishment. The girl had a straight face throughout most of their interactions and a smile was something. Something small, but something.

“How old are you?” Toni asked after the redhead resumed to her warm-ups once more, leaving her wondering about a lot of things. “Fourteen?” She guessed, the girl looked young and, even if taller than her, small in someway. Like the world was crushing her and she had nowhere to escape. Toni liked to read people, not that it would always be accurate, but she would try her best. When Cheryl shook her head, she took another guess. “Fifteen?” The ballerina nodded. “That's cute!” Toni chuckled, seeing the blush warm the girls cheeks. “I'm seventeen.”

Only two years older, that was barely a difference to call her cute like she was a seven year old. Besides, next month would be the redhead's birthday and the age gap would be even smaller. Cheryl rolled her eyes, action that didn’t go unnoticed by Toni, who simply smiled and shrugged.

“You look younger.” She offered, and Cheryl raised her eyebrows in defiance. “Innocent too.” Toni added.

The statement made Cheryl purse her lips and furrow her brows. Toni was about to say that her face was cute when she saw the redhead’s glare and stopped herself, raising her hands in surrender and smiling at her. Toni realized that the girl slowly became more comfortable, her straight face hadn’t made an appearance and she had a small, almost unperceptive smile on her face.

“Your first private is ballet?” Cheryl nodded, not as nervous at the girls presence as before. “Variation?” One more nod made Toni’s smile grow wider at the thought of which one the ballerina was rehearsing. “Which one?” The question was out of impulse, really, it left her mouth before Toni could realize the girl hadn’t uttered a word before and would probably not do it that day. She would have to guess and it would be even more difficult than guessing her age, the pink haired girl supposed.

“Nikiya."

The silence in the room made it easy for Toni to hear the answer muttered by Cheryl. Just like the dancer’s last question left her mouth without second thought, the same happened to Cheryl’s reply. Usually, when it comes to talking to people, Cheryl overthinks every word, every possible outcome after they’re said because she never knows when one wrong interpreted sentence could earn her a slap or a worse punishment, as it always happens in her household. The thoughts of not having the right words, of having someone expecting something to leave her mouth, or even just having to talk to people in general caused the redhead to be extremely anxious. The anxiety, however, didn’t come to her right after she answered Toni’s question.

Every time someone saw her talking to Katy about a private schedule, even if they could only see her mouth move, given the low volume of her voice, they always made such a big deal out of it, and it caused Cheryl to be even more nervous. Once, after hearing her tell Katy the time she wanted for her jazz private, a mother was so overwhelmed that pressured Cheryl to say whatever it was again, pressuring her even further when the redhead only looked at her with widened eyes and no intentions to talk again. The words “We heard you have a voice, just speak up.”, “You just talked to Katy, why can’t you talk to us?” and “That's weird, what does your mother think about it?” were proffered numerous times by the parent, even after Katy kindly asked her to leave Cheryl alone, causing Cheryl to run to the bathroom to empty the almost inexistent content of her stomach and nearly pass out due to the fact that she found herself unable to breath.

Panic was about to strike her at the thought of the newly met girl doing the same thing to her, her eyes were even filling with tears as she reminded of that fateful day. Before she could shed some tears and run out the door in ragged breaths, however, Toni spoke.

“You have a beautiful voice.” Toni’s soft and kind words made a stubborn tear leave Cheryl’s eyes, and it broke the pink haired girl’s heart to see that. She barely knew the younger dancer, having just met some solid fifteen minutes before, but she felt like protecting her from the world even so. She saw the redhead wipe the tear away and look at her with a smile, not a happy one, but a smile nonetheless. “Is it hard?” The question left her mouth and Toni realized how wrong it could be interpreted, given the situation, so she felt the need to complete. “The variation, I mean. It looks hard.”

Cheryl only shrugged, it wasn’t really hard to execute the movements, they only required a lot of balance and flexibility for most the first part, the second one required faster movements, although she didn’t find them that difficult, but it wasn’t easy to make those movements perfect either. So a shrug was the best answer she could give.

Toni suddenly stood up and stood in front of her, facing her as she smiled and tried to copy one of the moves she remembered of that variation. An arabesque a terre while holding a flower basket, then slightly jumping back a few times, with every jump, the arm holding the basket had to lower a few centimeters. Toni’s technique wasn’t that bad, Cheryl noticed, it wasn’t perfect either, but she could easily get better with the appropriate practice. Although her arabesque was really good, her small leaps made her look extremely clumsy as she tried to move her arm accordingly. Before she could stop herself, Cheryl giggled.

“Is it that bad?” Instead of mentioning the second sound that left the girl’s mouth that morning, Toni asked, chuckling as Cheryl shook her head, but a smile trying to hold back her laugh betrayed her and Toni knew the shake of head was a lie. “It's okay, I know it is.”

Miss Hearthorne never took that long to pick the supplies she needed for Cheryl’s practice, firstly because all the ballerina had to use as a prop for that variation were a piece of fabric and a basket, and secondly because she knew Cheryl didn’t really like to waste time when it came to practicing ballet. Every minute was a minute near perfection, although the coach knew really well that the level of perfection the redhead was trying to achieve was not humanly possible, and she told her that every class. Cheryl was never one to listen to others when she had a goal in mind, even an unreachable one. That morning, however, the girl wasn’t really complaining about the time her coach was taking, kind of actually rejoicing it.

“Can you show that to me?” Toni asked and her hopeful brown eyes made it hard for Cheryl to say no.

The ballerina stood up, her posture already giving indications of how good her execution would be. Toni anticipated, her mouth forming an o in amazingness when she saw it. The arabesque was high and turned out, her foot was pointed, its angle was perfect. The small jumps looked effortless and soft, as if she were jumping in clouds and her arms were perfectly coordinated, as if she didn’t even need to think to lower the right one, it was just second nature for her. Cheryl looked stunningly beautiful at that moment, not that she wasn’t before, but at that moment, even only executing a single movement, she looked outstanding.

“That was perfect!” The pink haired dancer praised. Cheryl, however, sighed and shook her head. In her mind, it was far from perfection. Far from beautiful. Far from what her mother expected from her. And wasn’t that what her life was all about? All about being what her mother expected. “It is! Don’t even deny that! It’s like you were born to dance.” The redhead smiled at the praise, but the words of comfort didn’t really reach her mind.

“Sorry I took too long girls, someone misplaced the basket and I only found it inside studio F.” Miss Hearthorne chose that moment to interrupt their interaction, walking inside the class in a rush. “Hope you got along well, at least.”

“We did!” Toni assured, smiling at the coach as Cheryl nodded, her face once again going back to the emotionless one she held when the two met. “So well that I’m actually going to ask Cheryl for her number so we can communicate whenever we’re away from the studio.” She informed, looking at the girl for approval and smiling as she nodded her head again.

The trainer opened a wide smile while observing the two girls, as soon as Cheryl nodded, Toni ran to her bag, that rested on the back wall and quickly grabbed her phone, as if afraid of Cheryl changing her mind. The redhead quickly typed her number on the phone and gave it back to the other girl.

“Shall we practice then, Cheryl?” The said girl nodded. Toni took that as her cue to leave and quickly picked up her bag, tossing her phone inside of it and running to the door.

“See you later, Cheryl.” She waved and Cheryl waved back, a smile graced her face for a single moment before Toni said her goodbyes to Miss Hearthorne “Thank you so much Miss Hearthorne, I won’t let you down.

“I’m sure of that, sweetie. Just take care okay?”

With a salute, Toni walked out the door, closing it behind her and leaving Cheryl and her coach alone.

“She's nice, isn’t she?” The redhead nodded. “I hope you become good friends, Cher…” Her trainer affectionately stated, knowing full well how badly Cheryl needed someone to count on that wasn't her brother. Cheryl only nodded, but, deep inside, she wanted to say ‘I hope for the same thing, Miss Hearthorne’.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiiiiiiiii
> 
> Okay, an early update because this week is going to be busy busy busy and I won't be able to post it on Tuesday as I hoped to. But it's okay because I was able to finish proofreading this today, so it can now be posted :)
> 
> Hope you enjoy this chapter (re-enjoy - that's not even a word lol -, actually, for the ones that have read it already, even though there have been some small changes)
> 
> Also, you can find me on twitter @bckwrds101

After her first encounter with Toni, the day dragged itself as it always did. Cheryl had her first ballet private, consisting of her variation rehearsal. Then she had a jazz private with Mr. Jackson, who constantly helped her with whatever difficulties she had, also helping her improve the new moves he taught during the regular classes, she was really good when it came to jazz, delivering an amazing performance whenever she was put on stage. Then she had her next ballet private, solely focused on her technique and how to improve it even more and it was Miss Hearthorne who instructed her and pointed out all the corrections she had to make. At eleven in the morning, although the day was only beginning for the young dancer, she felt like it could end and she wouldn't even miss it. It was time for her contemporary private with Mrs. Porter.

That particular coach wasn’t really fond of Cheryl, but she was the best the studio had and the redhead payed her really well for her privates. It usually came with a few insults about her figure, or about how tight her bun was and that could cause her hair to fall and never grow again. Once she refused to teach Cheryl unless she changed her clothes, telling her she wasn't going to teach anyone who wore leotards and tights to class, and the redhead wanted to refute by stating that her cousin Betty always wore that and was never denied a class, let alone a private, but her anxiety raised a few more levels near that teacher in particular and she couldn’t even bring herself to nod or shake her head sometimes. So she changed to her top and shorts and never wore her ballet outfit for a contemporary class again.

Cheryl was mentally preparing herself for another failed class when she walked through the door and saw Toni and Mrs. Porter talking, the latter with a smile Cheryl had never seen before, not even when she won first place with a contemporary solo in a competition three years back. They both looked at the redhead as she stopped dead on her tracks, knowing the coach didn’t like to be bothered when talking to other people.

“Cheryl, hi!” Toni called when she saw that the ballerina made no movement to walk towards them, walking to the back of the class instead. Cheryl turned and looked at her, surprised that someone would actually interrupt a conversation to acknowledge her presence. She was about to raise her hand and wave when her eyes met Mrs. Porter glare and her heart started pounding so hard on her chest she thought it was about to break out of her, her face didn’t betray how intimidated she was, but the sweat on the palm of her hands did. Looking down at her bag, she sat on the floor and started organizing what she needed for that class, which wasn’t much, really, but she needed something to do other than to stare at the two other people in the room.

Toni raised an eyebrow at the redhead's lack of reaction to her greeting, even when they first met that morning she wasn’t really like that. She didn’t have much time to think about it before Mrs. Porter, her new contemporary private coach - that Miss Hearthorne was being kind enough to provide her - spoke.

“Don't mind her, Toni.” The woman said, looking down at Cheryl as if she were nothing but a burden. The coach looked nice, why was she acting like that towards the younger girl? Toni wondered. “She's not much of a words person.” She informed and the pink haired girl looked back at Cheryl only to see how pale she looked and how hard she was pretending to search for something inside her purse, only to avoid having to stare at them. 

“Right, Cheryl?” The girl looked up as soon as her name was called by the teacher, her eyes widened as she nodded. “Never heard her speak, actually.” Mrs. Porter casually informed with a sigh. “It doesn’t help that she holds absolutely no talent but keeps requesting privates with me. I could be teaching someone like you, if I’m being honest, but her family’s money is too much for me to deny. Even if it’s a waste of time.”

If those words had been proffered in the Southside, with the amount of disdain they held and the intentions to hurt the other girl, Toni would be putting the woman in her place with a flick of her switchblade and a whistle for other Serpents to join her. But she had to remind herself that there were no serpents around and that definitely wasn’t the Southside. That was her only chance for a better future as a dancer, so she took a deep breath and calmed herself down before speaking.

“Is that so, Mrs. Porter? I saw Cheryl execute a pretty great ballet movement a few hours ago.” Toni said, as if the information was nothing and all she wanted was to make conversation.

“Well, she’s good at classical ballet, for sure.” Mrs. Porter gave in, with a shrug. “That doesn’t mean she holds any talent for contemporary. Do you, Cheryl? Do you have any talent for it? Do you even work that hard?” Toni heart broke for the second time that morning when she saw the redhead shake her head, unfazed at all the coach was saying, as if she heard that everyday.

Toni didn’t know, but she did hear that everyday. Every good day, if Cheryl’s being honest, on the bad days, she would hear worse, yelled words instead of spoken insults, that made her want to give up and prove the coach wrong at the same time. She never did any of those though, always coming back for a private at least two days later, after crying herself to sleep the night before in fear of what might happen during the class, but never really reaching Mrs. Porter’s expectations.

“Miss Hearthorne says she’s been practicing a lot lately.” The mention of the Dance Company owner made Mrs. Porter roll her eyes.

“Danielle is too kind. And Cheryl was always her favorite.” The coach retorted. “No matter how much she practices, she’s not getting anywhere if she keeps acting all high, mighty and untouchable.” Cheryl didn’t seem to be those things, Toni thought, especially since she took the information about the pink haired girl being from the Southside better than expected. “She's not getting worse, thankfully. But she’s not getting any better either. She doesn’t understand the essence of it, and doesn't even work hard to do so.”

Mrs. Porter was wrong. Cheryl tried really hard to do so, to understand what it takes, to let herself go as it was yelled for her to do so many times before. It was just hard. But Mrs. Porter didn’t understand that, because she didn’t really live in Cheryl’s shoes and Toni wouldn’t either, because that style seemed to come naturally to her. The redhead exhaled, sighing in defeat. Her private hadn’t even started yet and she was already about to lose her mind in despair.

“I have to start trying to work a miracle right now, Toni.” The coach announced, and Toni realized it was time for to leave the room so Mrs. Porter could start working with Cheryl.

“Good luck, Cheryl.” Toni waved, even though she knew no response would be given to her, given the way the redhead seemed to be nearly frozen in nervousness.

As expected, Cheryl didn’t even wave at her like the last time, and, the last thing she heard before leaving the classroom was Mrs. Porter stating “How rude!”.

The woman was a great private coach, Toni had to give it to her. It didn’t change the fact that she didn’t really seem willing to try everything with Cheryl for the ballerina to get better at contemporary. Maybe the fact that Toni was naturally good at it made it easier for them both to interact. But when it came to Cheryl, Toni already knew the girl had no appreciation for the contemporary style, given their previous talk - or Toni’s monologue, really -, and it was already hard to be good at something you hold no fondness for, doing that with a coach that had no real interest in helping her, could only contribute to the younger’s discouragement towards that art.

Toni sighed, picking up her phone to wait for her next class of the day. She had two hours in between her private and her classes, and going back to the southside was a waste of time. It was better just to wait for the class to start in the reception or one of the locker rooms.

** _To: Cheryl (Ballet)_ **

** _Hey, I’m really sorry about what you heard back in the classroom. It wasn’t very appropriate for Mrs. Porter to say all those things._ **

** _Ps.: This is Toni, the contemporary dancer._ **

To say the pink haired girl expected was an immediate reply was inaccurate. She knew Cheryl was having her one hour long contemporary private at the moment, so it would take at least one hour for her to see the message. And Toni was fooling herself if she said she wasn’t nervous at the possibility that the answer would never come, she wasn’t really sure how quiet the other dancer could be, even through texts.

When Cheryl left her private, her body slumped in defeat at how bad it was that day, the first thing she did was go to the restroom and lock one of its stalls. Her bag was resting on the floor as she sat beside the bowl and left tears of frustration leave her eyes, using her hand as a way to muffle her sobs. People hardly heard her voice, they wouldn’t start by hearing her cry, she thought.

It was undeniable that no progress was made during that private, no perfection was achieved and Mrs. Porter’s stern face wasn't even showing disappointment anymore, like it did during their first lessons. Cheryl knew the coach had long given up on her, and knew her words about the ballerina having no talent for that style of dance hurt, but weren’t untrue. It was a waste of money, every time she left the private the thought would go through her head. No corrections were being made, words barely left Mrs. Porter’s mouth and, when they did, were almost always insults, and nothing could shake the feeling that Cheryl would never be able to dance to that style and actually look decent.

After a while of small cries and a lot of thoughts, Cheryl picked up her phone. Her initial idea was to text her brother telling him about how bad that day was going, but she had one or two guesses about what he was going to say. 

Jason was probably going to tell her to cancel her privates with that coach, that they were only making her feel worse about herself when it came to that particular style, that the teacher should never do those things, and that she wasn’t bad at all, she just didn’t like the way she danced because she didn’t like the dance style itself. He told her that almost every day when she would talk about her failures when it came to contemporary, and he wasn’t wrong, but Cheryl couldn’t keep herself from trying, especially when she had the means to it, which consisted of money to pay for the best private coach of the studio and time to practice.

Looking at her phone, however, she stared at the screen when she saw that an unfamiliar number had texted her - no one but Jason did so - and she smiled while reading Toni’s text, not because of the words she wrote, but the way she tried to make her feel better. Cheryl knew what the coach said wasn’t really appropriate, and if Miss Hearthorne knew about that, Mrs. Porter would never teach Cheryl a private again, but that didn’t change the fact that her words held some truth to them.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_It’s okay. It’s not like I’m not used to it… or she’s even wrong._

Toni stared at the notification of the arrived text and quickly read it, curling her fists at the way Mrs. Porter was able to get into Cheryl’s head, and the fact that, from what the redhead had let on, it was a recurrent situation. Although angry at what the girl goes through during her contemporary practices, she couldn’t help but smile when reading her complete sentence, relieved that they could have a better conversation through texts.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**She’s wrong. Don’t let her get to your head like that, you’ll only feel more discouraged. I saw you doing that ballet step today, remember? There’s no way you hold absolutely no talent for contemporary, maybe the fact that you don’t really like it makes it hard for you, but it doesn’t make you less talented.**

Cheryl smiled once again, despite her tear stricken face, as she read the girls words. She did wondered if the fact that her dislike for that style was what made her bad at it, but the fact she couldn’t appreciate it never stopped her from trying. So it wasn’t lack of fondness, because even if she didn’t like it, she tried to be good, to be perfect.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Thank you. And I’m sorry about earlier._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**What about earlier?**

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_When I said I didn’t like contemporary. It was not polite of me to do so._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**Don’t stress about that, Cheryl. I understand it’s hard for some people to appreciate it. And I’m sorry I couldn’t say anything to stop Mrs. Porter’s words, I can’t really defy her when she’s the best coach and I need her lessons.**

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_You shouldn't really get into her bad side, Toni._

Toni’s brows furrowed at the last text. The advice was given throughout pure experience, Toni could imagine, seeing the way Cheryl was treated by the mentioned coach. It only increased her anger because she couldn’t understand how would Cheryl get into someone’s bad side. It wasn’t like she said rude or disrespectful things to anyone, from what the dancer could gather, the redhead hardly said anything at all.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**You have a lot of talent, and no one should tell you otherwise.**

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_You’ve never seen me dance contemporary._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**It may not be your forte, and I still hardly doubt that, but you’re putting some effort into it, and it’s going to pay off.**

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Yeah. I hope it does._

Despite her straightforward answers, and the fact that Cheryl didn’t really seem to take whatever Toni said to her heart, although she should, the contemporary dancer felt like the girl not only answering things with one word or even one emoji was something to be acknowledged as a development for their future long-lasting friendship. There was no way she would give up on being friends with Cheryl just because the ballerina didn’t speak much, so Toni would definitely find a way to make that friendship last. Even if they had to talk only through texts, even if she had to have monologues when they’re face to face while the girl only nodded or shook her head, aside from some occasional slips where she would say something, like when she answered the variation she was about to practice.

With those thoughts in mind, Toni stood up, meaning to leave the locker room she was waiting in to find the said redhead. Only to be stopped when the girl herself walked in, her shoulders were slumped and her eyes a little red. Other than that, she looked like the perfect ballerina Toni’d met a few hours ago, everything neat and organized - the fact that her bun wasn’t messed up after four privates impressed the Southsider, who couldn’t even bring herself to pull her hair in a tight bun in first place -.

“Hey, Red!” The pink haired girl called, once she realized the girl hadn’t noticed her in the corner of the room. With a jump, and an almost accidental yelp in surprise, Cheryl turned around to face her, her lips forming an almost imperceptive smile as she raised her hand as a greeting.

Seeing that as an opportunity to approach, Toni walked closer to the girl and sat right beside her, leaving her bag on the floor as Cheryl did the same. The classical dancer spotted the difference between their bags, hers was so big and heavy, while the other dancer’s wasn’t nearly as full, seeming extremely small for all the supplies they needed.

“How was your private?” After their texts exchange, it actually slipped through Toni’s mind the fact that only Yes or No questions would be appropriate.

Cheryl only shrugged, fighting the urge not to break down again. She wondered, for a second, what would her mother say seeing her have a meltdown infront of someone she’d just met, so she stopped herself and urged the tears not to fall.

“Was Mrs. Porter nice?”

Another shrug, not confirming or denying Toni’s suspicions that, from the way Cheryl’s eyes were red, nice would be the last definition for the said coach. And she was right, Cheryl almost wanted to scoff at that question because there hadn’t been a day in her privates where Mrs. Porter had been anything but a witch. Even when she was “nice" she wasn’t really nice, given the fact that her “nice" days were when she only sat in the back of the room, going through her phone while Cheryl danced, only to say words like “horrendous” or “awful" after she finished.

Toni was about to say something when the door to the locker room opened, causing both the girls to look that way and the redhead to sink back in her chair at the sight of another teenager. The daughter of the crazy mother who’d turned a simple request to Katy in the receptionist into a panic attack. The girl marched towards them with the confidence Cheryl lacked, and that Toni tried not to show, in order to be in everyone’s good graces.

“I don’t think we’ve met.” The stranger said with a wicked smile, looking at Toni up and down before offering a hand. “I'm Veronica Lodge.” And before the pink haired dancer could answer, she added “Of the Park Avenue Lodges”

“Toni.” Toni took the offered hand, shaking it, not failing to notice Cheryl’s discomfort right beside her, seeming to look everywhere but the raven haired girl. “Toni Topaz.”

“Oh!” Veronica raised her brow in amusement. “Like the purple colored gemstone. Love it!” Her smile grew wider when she looked at Cheryl. “Blossom.” Cheryl only stared at her, not even making an effort to show any reaction. “Well, that’s expected.” The girl laughed, a laugh that would earn her a few broken teeth in the southside. 

“Is there a reason why you’re sitting here with her instead of joining everyone back in the reception?” She turned her attention back to Toni while asking that. The way she said ‘her’, as if disgusted, made the Southsider take one deep breath instead of curling her hand in a fist.

So there were people in the reception, Toni acknowledged. She was there in the locker room because she had no idea about that, she never missed the opportunity to meet new people, but Cheryl obviously knew that and would still sit alone in that chair if Toni hadn’t been around.

“I like it here.” Her answer came along with a careless shrug. “I like Cheryl’s company.” Toni added, looking at the girl beside her, noticing her blush and look down. Unfortunately, she wasn’t the only one to notice that.

“If you enjoy silence, I suppose.” The privileged girl mentioned, with a shrug and a disdainful look before turning it into a wide mischievous smile. “Cheryl Blossom has a crush.” Veronica teased as she stared at the girl’s flushed cheeks, knowing too well Cheryl hated having the attention towards herself, especially if it was supposed to embarrass her. Which it did.

Toni saw Cheryl’s jaw clench whilst she searched for something inside her bag, she was probably not looking for anything in particular, but made it seem like it was important. Her hair pulled in a tight bun made it easier for Toni to see her eyes, filled with tears.

“We just met a few hours ago, Lodge.” Toni rolled her eyes at the girl’s attempt to cause Cheryl some discomfort.

“I wouldn’t put it past Cheryl to develop an instant lesbian crush on the new girl. ” Veronica once again tried to embarrass the redhead, succeeding this time when a single tear ran down her face.

“Good thing I’m into girls just as I am into guys, then.” The statement proudly left Toni's mouth, half urging Veronica to shut up, half trying to show Cheryl that no matter what the raven haired girl said, it was okay.

Veronica lowered herself to the girls height, since they were sitting down and she was standing. Her hand quickly grabbed Cheryl’s chin, making the girl shudder in discomfort, and Toni slapped it away, glaring at its owner. A dramatic sight left the girl as she stood closer to Toni’s ear and whispered.

“You could have chosen better.”

Cheryl couldn’t help but snort at that statement, regretting it right after when both the girls turned their heads to look at her.

“Got something to say, Blossom?” Veronica defied, but her eyes betrayed her for a split second, like if Cheryl decided to speak at that exact moment, some things might be spilled about the raven haired girl that might ruin her.

There were so many things to say, Cheryl couldn’t even count. Starting from the fact that Veronica knew nothing about ‘choosing better', since a couple years prior she was coming onto Cheryl, wanting nothing more than to kiss and be with her. And then, just because the redhead was too scared to do the same - God forbid Penelope Blossom find out about her daughter’s sexuality - , the raven haired took the rejection to heart and decided to make Cheryl’s life a living hell, making some of the girls in the studio believe Cheryl was completely obsessed with her and tried to kiss her forcefully once inside the locker room.

The fact that, while Cheryl was a thirteen year old girl, Veronica had just turned fifteen back then, and knew what could happen - and actually did happen - if the redhead’s parents found out about those rumors, hurt more than having her best friend turn against her from night to day. The only way Cheryl could avenge herself was beating Veronica in every single competition they both had solos in, never once getting second place over the other dancer.

However, Veronica was far from her best friend now, and, even if she had so many times heard Cheryl’s voice, loud and clear, that wasn’t the case anymore. So, to her question, the redhead only shook her head, lowering herself again to grab her phone inside her bag.

A scoff left Veronica’s mouth, although it probably masked a relieved sigh, before she stated. “Once again, as expected. See you around, Tammy.” With that, she walked away.

“Toni.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> @bckwrds101


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, here's another chapter.
> 
> Honestly, I can't wait till I get to the part where I rewrite everything cause I'm getting kinda bored posting everything you've read before. Thankfully, I'm less busy right now so I think I'll be able to rewrite it faster :) For now, see you next week!
> 
> @bckwrds101

Cheryl and Toni, after that annoying encounter with Veronica, sat in the locker room for a bit more, Toni showing the girl some beautiful pinterest pictures, smiling proudly as the girl reacted to each and every one of them, either with a raised eyebrow, a pout, a smile or even a giggle once. At some point, the contemporary dancer asked if she had any social media, for what the girl quickly shook her head, making Toni wonder why, but, knowing she would probably not get an accurate explanation for that, the girl decided to ask that through texts after class. The name Veronica Lodge didn’t leave her mouth once, since Toni had no intentions to press further on the interaction she’d just witnessed, and been part of.

As soon as the clock hit 12:50, both girls walked together to their classes.The first one was jazz, a style Toni wasn’t the best in, but wasn’t bad either, she just went with the flow and followed the others. Cheryl was great at it, not as amazing as in ballet, but great nonetheless, her movements were sharp and accurate, she knew what to do and when to do it so everything was as good as it needed to be.

Before that class started, Toni also got to meet two other classmates who treated her with nothing but kindness. Betty Cooper, a giggly sixteen year old who was the first to greet Toni - and Cheryl, since the pink haired girl made sure to sit by her side in the beginning - and was also the one to tell her about the class dynamics, the teachers and the upcoming competitions. 

“Do you also compete?” Toni had asked Cheryl as soon as she learned about the competition team. The ballerina’s answer was a small nod, making Toni smile.

“Cheryl's the best on the team!” And that’s how Toni met Josie McCoy, a seventeen year old who casually sat by Cheryl’s other side, smiling kindly at the redhead before offering the other two a wide smile while telling Toni. “I heard you’re the best contemporary dancer we’ll have in the studio.” Toni had shrugged, but her smile showed she was proud of hearing that, even more when Cheryl nodded beside her, as if to confirm those rumors were true.

After that, the teacher arrived and all the dancers positioned themselves to start their hour long class. Toni, seeing Cheryl’s abilities in another dance style, could now believe even less that she wasn’t good in contemporary.

The following class was just a 30 minute warm up and 30 minute gymnastics. Josie’s specialty were tricks, so she was just as good as that as Betty and Toni were bad, not having, the latter, received proper training in that area. Cheryl could execute everything, but she didn’t consider herself to be that good, comparing to how good she was at ballet, when it came to gymnastics, she definitely wasn’t a natural.

Then, there was a 30 minute break when Toni allowed herself to sit back in one of the locker room benches, Cheryl by her side and Betty and Josie in front of them. The two girls Toni had met earlier were extremely friendly and really funny, and, better than that, tried their best to include Cheryl in whatever conversation they were having, always making sure to look at her for a nod, a frown or a shrug. She wondered if they had already heard Cheryl’s real voice, but would never ask such thing, in order not to hurt the said girl’s feelings.

From 3:30 to 5 the girls had contemporary, their last class of the day before they could all go back home and rest. The teacher wasn’t Mrs. Porter, the private coach, for Cheryl’s relief, it was someone less mean, but no less straightforward, so the redhead carefully tried to execute all the movements. It was always hard in some classes, because, in the beginning, Ms. Montgomery would choose a random song and tell them to walk around, feel their bodies, move them however they wanted, which resulted in everyone walking around doing extravagant movements in order to catch the teacher’s attention and Cheryl to walk in circles, doing nothing but moving her hands - when she was feeling inspired -. The ballerina was used to be told what to do, not once choosing to improvise, given how shy and self conscious she was, she had never the confidence to do such things, although she was perfectly capable to do so - she’s done it in the comfort of her bedroom so many times, but it’s just different when it comes to doing it with people watching -. 

That was one of those classes where Ms. Montgomery wanted the dancers to know themselves, their limits, their bodies, so she chose the previously mentioned dynamic as a way for them to do so. Toni was spectacular, even if that was only a preparation for class, almost as a warm-up, everyone could know she was a natural. Cheryl envied her carefreeness, the way her body moved on her own command in front of people, with no need for the coach to tell her what to do, when to do it or how to move, but she was happy for the girl. Toni was raw talent, anyone could see, and Cheryl almost found herself smiling at the fact that the pink haired dancer would finally get the training she deserves, unaware of how the southsider’s previous training dynamics were.

To say Toni was curious about Cheryl’s contemporary skills was an understatement. She wanted nothing but to stare at the girl throughout the entire class to find out what made her think so low of herself when it came to that style of dance. What she found out, however, after their first dynamic - in which Cheryl only walked around with a blush on her face, not doing anything with her body - was that there was nothing extremely wrong with the redhead’s skills, having her executed the routine they were given with amazing technique. There was definitely something lacking, almost as if no matter how technically good it was, the performance would never be complete, but, whatever it was, didn’t really make her the worst contemporary dancer in the room. She was actually better than average, and it definitely didn’t make any of Mrs. Porter’s words accurate, because Cheryl had talent, there was something missing, but it wasn’t talent.

At 5 o’clock, everyone went home to rest. Toni had to fill in her application with Katy and hand her all the papers, authorization forms and medical tests they asked her to bring, so she had to stay behind. When asked if she liked the studio, she couldn’t help but start rambling about how amazing it was, how good the classes were and how she loved it. When asked about friends, she quickly mentioned Josie, Betty and Cheryl, hearing the latter’s name, Katy offered her a sad smile, knowing full well how difficult it could be to interact with the girl.

As she was leaving, after 30 more minutes talking to Katy, Toni walked to the back room to pick up her helmet - yes, she did ride a motorcycle to class - and heard a familiar song close to studio E. The familiar song was the one they’d practiced a small contemporary combo with, making the pink haired girl curious to who was there even after all those classes. It was no surprise for her when she carefully opened the door and saw Cheryl diligently working on the combo, her eyes were closed as if she didn’t need them opened to do it, but, really, she didn’t want to see herself dancing to it, she wouldn’t like it, anyways.

“You know” Toni started, making the redhead open her eyes and look at her from her place on the other side of the room, her cheeks were flushed and sweat dropped from her skin, like she’d been trying too hard and gotten nothing back, so she'd kept pushing herself. “When you were so sure about your lack of contemporary skills earlier, I thought you’d be really bad at it and I would have to lie to your face telling you that you had what it took.” Cheryl stared at her as she let out a chuckle “Turns out you’re better than almost everyone in that class.”

Cheryl only looked at her, unsure of what to say, given the fact that those words were hardly questions, merely statements and no nod of shake of head could answer to that. So all the redhead could do was watch as the other dancer approached her with a smile, showing that there were no expectations for her to answer, just a comfortable silence and the reminder that whatever it is Cheryl thinks she’s bad at, is not even half as bad as it could be. Hell, it’s not even bad in first place. 

As Toni sat on the floor, right next to where she was standing, Cheryl did the same, breathing deeply to recover from the frustrated tries on the combo they’d learned before. No girls said anything for a while, before Toni spoke again.

“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.” At the curious glance the redhead shot her, she continued “Miss Hearthorne told me about the performances for next month. She said I have to choose a ballet variation.” Cheryl nodded. “I’m kinda nervous because it’s my first time doing that, you know? And it’s not like ballet is my forte. But I want the teachers to see that I can do it.”

The dance studio more often than not made the girls choose one ballet variation and another choreography from any other style to perform in front of all the coaches and staff. There was no reward for that, aside from the great inputs the dancers received, not a first place award or anything like that. Cheryl liked to compete, and most likely win, not being encouraged by casual displays of interest by the teachers, that’s why she paid her privates for, but she would choose amazing variations nonetheless, and perform some nice choreographies - she even adventured herself with contemporary once -, only for the sake of performing on stage, which was her greatest passion.

“I suppose yours will be Nikiya, right?” Cheryl shook her head, Nikiya was only for competitions that season. “You're rehearsing two variations, then?” The ballerina nodded, and Toni looked at her in pure admiration. “I wish I could. Even one is going to be a pain in the ass for me… sorry about the language.” A smile graced both their features, but knowing she wouldn't receive any other answer, she continued. “What is going to be yours?”

Cheryl didn’t speak. She opened her mouth once or twice to try and get the words out, but she couldn’t bring her self to do so. Maybe the embarrassment of being caught dancing to a style the other girl mastered was still pressing her. Toni looked at her with gentle eyes and placed her hand on top of hers. It was okay, actually, the pink haired dancer supposed she was lucky enough to hear her quiet voice earlier that day.

“Well, I’m thinking about Peasant.” Toni kept talking, in an attempt to ease the girl, seeing the nervous glance she displayed when nothing left her mouth.

Peasant. Cheryl tried not to grimace, failing miserably at the thought of Toni dancing to that. Toni, who danced so freely, who had amazing feet and flexibility. Toni, who attempted to mimic one of the steps in the Nikiya variation and wasn’t really that bad, just clumsy. Not that Peasant wasn’t fine… it was… for a twelve year old, or a professional soloist that needed to dance that for the sake of the show, not a seventeen year old dancer who had some things to prove to the studio. Clearly, that variation was not her favorite, and the fact that Betty was given it at the previous competition season made her sick of it even more, since they spent so much time hearing that music over and over again, and watching Betty perform it.

The grimace was about to be commented on by Toni, who noticed it, when a cell phone ring interrupted them. It was Cheryl’s. The pink haired girl wondered if she even spoke at the phone. Clearly not, since all she did was slide her finger to reject the call and type a quick reply, standing up and grabbing her bag.

“I guess that’s our goodbye.” Toni also stood up when the girl nodded. Cheryl wanted to explain that her brother was outside waiting for her, and he needed her to leave the building as soon as possible because he was probably going to drop her at home to go somewhere with Reggie Mantle or Polly Cooper, Betty’s sister. However, all she did was wave goodbye, walking towards the door and leaving. Toni soon followed her in order to pick up her bike from the parking lot and ride back to the Southside.

As soon as Cheryl entered the car, Jason looked at her with a big grin on his face. Yep, definitely date with Polly Cooper.

“How was you day, Cher?” He asked, to what the girl only shrugged, not really in the mood for talking, not even to her brother, it was exhausting sometimes. The boy kept his eyes on the road, then, knowing she would probably say something if she wanted to, or wouldn’t say anything until they got home. “I'm going out with Polly Cooper today.”

“Peasant.” Cheryl scoffed, not even acknowledging Jason’s last statement. “Peasant!” She said it louder and more aggravated that time. “She’s going to choose Peasant!”

“Who's choosing what?” Jason asked, confused at his sister’s indignation.

“Toni.” The female twin answered, still unable to believe someone would voluntarily choose that variation to rehearse and perform in front of great dance professionals. 

“Who's Toni?” The boy asked again, because he couldn't remember anyone in Cheryl's studio named that, let alone someone his sister spoke about as an acquaintances. She spoke about Betty Cooper, Josie McCoy, even Veronica Lodge when Jason pressed her about it, but never once a Toni.

“You don’t know her.” Cheryl failed to tell him she was from the southside, aware that the boy had no prejudices, but always let things slip when their mother was around and she didn’t want to jeopardize Toni’s stay in the dance studio. “And that’s not even the matter.”

“The matter is…”

“Who chooses Peasant?” The girl nearly yells in frustration, making Jason laugh out loud. How could someone change so much from how she acted when people were around and how she acted when it was just the two of them, he didn’t know. He found it funny, though, worried about his sister’s situation, of course, but amused when her true colors showed.

“Clearly that Toni person.” He answered, simply, gaining a glare from her.

The drive to Thornhill was less than fifteen minutes, in which Cheryl sat in silence, thinking about how to politely tell the pink haired girl that Peasant was the worst choice, for anything, really, but especially for impressing the teachers. A seven year old with a puppy dance could impress them more than that variation. Or it was only Cheryl’s personal thoughts. Maybe the teachers did like it but she'd just rather see Toni dance to something else because of the potential the girl held.

Out of impulse, before even leaving the car to walk inside the house, Cheryl grabbed her phone.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Don’t choose Peasant._

The text itself seemed like a command, Cheryl noticed right after she pressed send. Regret hit her instantly, thinking how not polite she acted towards Toni for the second time that day. However, the message was sent and there was nothing the redhead could do about that.

Toni was at the Whyte Wyrm when she received the message, hanging out with her friends after practice, before going home. She read the text and frowned, unsure of why Cheryl would even send her that. The ballerina had way more experience than her when it came to classical ballet, so of course Toni would take that advice, but curiosity at the girl’s motivations made her send a question as a reply.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**And why is that?**

The redhead walked insider her room and threw her tired body in bed, allowing herself a little time before taking a long relaxing bath - she needed it after the awful private she’d had with Mrs. Porter that day - and starting her school work. Cheryl knew exactly why Toni shouldn’t choose that choreography, only stopping herself from typing an answer when she realized it wouldn't be a really nice one.

After some thought, maybe she should just go with the not so nice answer, so the other dancer could understand exactly how she acted with someone close to her. They weren’t close, but if Toni wanted to be, as she was indicating earlier, it would be better if Cheryl just showed her some of her true self. A text version of herself, of course.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_You’re not twelve._

Toni nearly choked on her drink when she read that. She’d never think Cheryl would answer something like that, expecting some lecture about technique, correct movements and those stuff from the girl.

“Who's the boy or girl that caused you to have such reaction, Tiny?” Sweet Pea, her best friend asked, a pool pole in his hand and a beer in the other, although he wasn’t even old enough for that, and he definitely had school in the morning. That thought reminded Toni at her own online school work she had to turn in, causing her to stand up and rush towards the door.

“It's a girl, Sweets. You don’t know her.” She spoke whilst opening the exit door.

“Is she cute?” He asked, a raised brow and a smile on his face.

“The most beautiful ballerina ever.” She answered.

“One day into that Dance Studio and you’re in love with a privileged northsider already, hm?” The taller boy teased and Toni didn’t even bother to answer him before shutting the door behind her back.

The dancer remembered Veronica’s words from before._ 'I wouldn’t put it past Cheryl to develop an instant lesbian crush on the new girl''_. She chuckled, wondering what would Veronica think if she knew who was the one to actually have the crush.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**That was straightforward lol but thank you. What do you suggest, though?**

Cheryl had a few variations in mind already. Thinking how beautiful the girl would look dancing to each and every one of them, feeling her cheeks flush and her fingers pinch the inside of her thigh at the same time. Both reactions contrasting from affection to fear at that one thought.

Thornhill was creepy and Greendale - the witches town -was not so far, so she wouldn’t really be surprised if her mother could read her mind or something like that. The redhead expected the woman to arrive in her room at any moment after the previous thought - of how amazing Toni, a girl, a beautiful girl, would look while dancing to the variations she had in mind - with a scowl on her face and a belt in her hand. When it didn’t happen, she typed the reply.

To: Toni (Contemporary)

_Flames of Paris (Best choice). Paquita (Whichever would be nice). Sugar Plum Fairy (If you’re feeling calm but daring) . Princess Florine - Blue Bird (If you really feel that childlike and still want Peasant after all the previous choices - this one is more impressive, at least)._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**Honestly, Cherry. There’s no way I could pull any of those off.**

Cheryl smiled at the nickname whereas Toni hadn’t really thought much of it before sending the text. Now that it was sent, she wondered if she’d pushed any boundaries. She didn’t, the redhead even liked it, only having received a nickname from Jason before. Advocating for her favorite choice, Cheryl typed her reply.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Flames is not as hard as it seems, I danced it and it took me less than three days to pick the choreography up. All I had to do was to clean it later._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**I see you’re voting for Flames of Paris, then?**

Even though Toni couldn’t see her, Cheryl nodded. Out of habit, maybe. And Flames of Paris actually was one of her favorite variations, although it may not be that difficult as some others she’d performed, was one she really liked doing so.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_I really love it._

Toni chuckled at the girl’s answer, knowing full well there was no way she would be able to perform such variation. But it was Cheryl suggesting it, Cheryl, who hadn’t spoke more than a word that day and that word was probably Toni’s luck. So the contemporary dancer decided to try. For Cheryl, she would.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**I’m not sure if I can do it, but since you’re the one suggesting, I’ll try lol**

Before she could stop herself, Cheryl replied.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_I could help you._

And as soon as it was sent, she instantly regretted. For two reasons, actually. First one: how would she help the other girl when there’s no way she’s going to be able to speak, even though she wanted to sometimes, and tried to, most of them, but couldn’t bring herself to do so. Second and most nerve-wrecking one: after suggesting the variation to the pink haired girl, Cheryl already sent a text as if she wouldn’t be able to make it without help. It was no big deal, really, not many people would read that much into a simple text offering help. But Cheryl did, and that’s when the word vomit started.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_If you need any help, of course._

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Not that I think you will._

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_You’ll be great._

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_But if you need anything, I could help._

Seeing so many notifications on her phone, Toni couldn’t help but laugh. She understood what the redhead was worried about, but honestly, she knew Cheryl didn’t mean that Toni wouldn’t be able to do it.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**Thank you, Red. Btw, all this rambling was really really cute, did you know that? lol**

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Forget about the help I just offered._

Toni could picture the girl pouting while answering to that, the way she pouted when Toni showed her a picture in the locker room - one saying how contemporary dancers were cooler or something like that - and the girl shook her head with the cutest annoyed facial expression. She also knew, for some reason, that Cheryl was kidding, but decided to answer exaggeratedly to the previous text anyways.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**What? NOOOO!! I’ll need your help. Definitely!**

Cheryl smiled. She would never deny helping anyone who needed it, and asked for it, of course. Always being the one assigned to show the movements to some students in class, not only in ballet, showed her it was important to offer whatever she could for the sake of the greater good. The dance recital at the end of the year would be no good if only a few dancers were decent and the others were just… others could be better.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Pick the choreography up and I’ll help you clean it._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**Thanks you so so so so so so much!**

For some reason, Toni remembered Cheryl’s contemporary class that morning, and how it seemed to be doing nothing but bringing the girl down. So she decided to offer what she had, just like the redhead was doing for her.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**And I could help you with contemporary, if you want. No offense to Mrs. Porter but she seems to be frustrating you more than helping, and it would be a waste seeing all that money thrown away just for the sake of you trying hard only to have your development crushed by that woman. Please don’t tell her I said that, I still need her privates, though. I just think you could do better with someone who actually sees your talent. And, not really wanting to brag, but you heard Josie, I’m probably the best contemporary dancer in the studio.**

Once again, out of habit, Cheryl nodded at the phone screen. For a moment, she forgot to actually type an answer, but did that as soon as she stared at the phone screen with Toni’s huge message written on it. 

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_You probably are. And is that a way for you to offer me privates?_

Cheryl hoped it was. Toni was right when she said that those privates with Mrs. Porter were not helping, but she had no other option before, for Mrs. Porter was the best. Now, she has Toni, who’s not a teacher but is as good as if she were, and was way more polite and gentle to her than her private coach had ever been.

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**Well, if you want to, I mean… and if Miss Hearthorne lets us use the studio, I’d be glad to help you with whatever you need.**

Of course she wanted to. Although there was also another pressing issue. Not for her, actually, but she wanted to show Toni she valued the girl’s time and effort to help her.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_How much?_

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**How much would you charge for helping me with my ballet variation?**

Why would she even ask such thing? Cheryl asked herself. Toni knew Cheryl didn’t need the money. Besides, Cheryl knew that Toni was the one who had kind of a scholarship at the studio and probably was the one needing it.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_I wouldn’t, of course._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**That’s my exact answer, sweetie. Free private classes with Antoinette Topaz. You’re a lucky one ;)**

Honestly, Cheryl wanted to argue about how unfair it was that she was going to receive privates and Toni wouldn’t charge for them. It wasn’t fair to Toni, who would spend - waste, the redhead thought with a sigh - her time trying to help Cheryl when she could be doing other things - she he failed to understand she’d be doing the same thing, and Toni didn’t seem to be complaining about it -. However, something else caught her attention, causing her to smile widely.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Is your real name really Antoinette?_

If there were ways to hide inside a hole at the moment, Toni would. Her cheeks flushed as she face palmed herself for not realizing she’d just disclosed her full - and cringeworthy - name. It was just better to end the conversation right there and then.

** To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**OMG! Forget you read that. Good night, Blossom.**

Cheryl’s smile grew impossibly wider before she typed a reply.

_To: Toni (Contemporary)_

_Night, Antoinette._

_With an eye roll, Toni sent the last text of the night._

**To: Cheryl (Ballet)**

**Toni.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the note of the first version of this: "Full disclaimer: I do not hate Peasant as much as Cheryl does and in no way, mean or form I think it's an easy variation or think that those who dance it are any less than those who dance to the other ones I listed. I just needed a variation for Cheryl to pick on and Peasant was the choice. It could have been any other, but Peasant was the one on my mind at the time." 
> 
> I do hate Peasant, to be honest. I don't, however, think it's an easy variation or think any less of those who dance it, because ballet is so fucking hard and every variation and dancers deserve recognition. And Peasant is great - those who dance it are great, like amazing, you have to be very good to be chosen for a solo -, I just don't like it. Choices. 
> 
> twitter: @bckwrds101


	4. Chapter 4

It took Toni one week to learn the variation. At least memorize it, because when it came to actually doing the steps, she could barely dance it properly. During that week, her interactions with Cheryl had only developed throughout texts, since their meetings in person always consisted of Toni talking during their breaks - Josie and Betty joined them whenever it was possible - while the redhead stared at her with big brown doe-eyes, nodding or shaking her head when deemed necessary.

That didn’t really frustrate Toni like it did to everyone else - sometimes she could see even Cooper and McCoy sighing and rolling their eyes at the girl’s quietness - because she knew Cheryl could and would speak whenever she was comfortable to do so. All the pink haired dancer tried to do was to make her as comfortable as possible, not in order to make her speak, but to show her that even if she didn’t, there’s no problem with that.

Just because Cheryl didn’t really say stuff, it didn’t make her an emotionless human being. There were small things that showed the opposite. After a while, Toni picked up on her good and bad days, noticing how, on the former, she wordless helped the other girls with ballet steps - Josie, Toni and Betty, mostly -, tapping their shoulders with gentle hands and trying to show them how it was done and how they could improve. Or how, on the latter, the redhead’s nails would dig, or her fingers would pinch, on whatever body part she could touch without bringing attention to that action, or how Cheryl would forcefully tug on her legs to stretch them even more, even after she reached her limit. On bad days, Toni made sure to tell the ballerina funny stories about her and her friends, watching the girl’s eyes change from expressionless to amused, and how she forced herself to smile.

“Cheryl…” Toni called her one day, finding her in the hallways, going from one private to another. The redhead acknowledged her presence with a smile, a sign for her to keep talking. “Remember when you offered help? With Flames of Paris?” Cheryl nodded. “Well, I could use some… like today or whenever.” The ballerina looked at her as she spoke. “But…no pressure.” She smiled and Cheryl tried to do the same while nodding. “So… today?” With one last nod, Cheryl walked inside the classroom for a ballet private, that she was already two minutes late and close to tears because of that.

“Great! Today we’ll think about my ballet skills and tomorrow about your contemporary ones.” The pink haired dancer offered, not waiting for the other to reply, just turning around and leaving.

~

That day of classes was almost over, which meant Toni’s ballet practice was about to start. Finding Cheryl in the locker room. She walked towards the girl and was about to say something when a voice spoke before her. To her.

“Toni.” Veronica’s grin was creepy and, for a moment, Toni wondered if she always looked as if she were going to murder someone or if that look was reserved just for her. “We haven’t spoke in a while.”

_Thankfully_. Toni thought but didn't comment. The two girls hadn't talked since Toni’s first day, when Veronica was so rude to Cheryl that caused the new girl to develop an instant repulse for someone so mean.

“Indeed.” Was the pink haired girl’s indifferent reply.

“So, I’ve asked about you…” The raven haired girl mentioned, and Cheryl, who was already distressed about her former friend’s presence, froze, knowing where it was going. “Riverdale High. You don’t go there, do you?”

“Online school.” The clueless contemporary dancer answered, still undisturbed by Veronica’s statements.

“Just like Cheryl, how lovely.” There was an inch of sarcasm and irony in that comment and Toni, for a moment, wished they were in the Southside so she could solve that conversation using her own ways. Before she could even close her hands in fists, Veronica continued. “Well, turns out not one single Northsider was able to tell me who you were, or if they’d seen you around.”

That was it, Toni sighed. That was how she was going to lose the best opportunity of her life to an arrogant mean girl. She was about to blow up her cover when she heard someone else speak. Barely.

“Greendale.”

“What was that, Cher?” The nickname left Veronica’s mouth so freely that caused Cheryl to grimace, staring at her for a second before looking down at her bag, in nervousness. That was the first time she opened her mouth to say something next to Veronica in years. In Toni’s aid, she somehow wouldn’t mind doing it again.

“She means that’s where I live.” Toni lied, smoothly despite the previous panic in her eyes, thanking heavens for the redhead’s quick thinking.

“Wicked.” Veronica comment, unenthusiastically, although her eyes didn’t leave Cheryl as the girl found her phone inside the bag. “You're a witch then?” The raven haired girl smiled, turning her attention back to Toni.

‘If I were, you’d be gone by now.’ The pink haired girl wanted to retort, but decided against it. She’d just avoided people finding out her origins, she couldn't risk anything else.

“Nah.” A shrug followed her simple answer.

“Well, that’s boring.” With a sigh, Veronica turned around and left the locker room.

Toni waited for a while after she left, to make sure she wasn't coming back, to ask “Is she always like that?”

Cheryl felt like saying she was usually worse, that the girl was actually extremely collected these past few days. The redhead really didn’t want to jinx it, though. Not having Veronica torment her just in order to hear her voice was a miracle, and she wanted things to stay like that. She was actually surprised no rumors reached Toni, about the locker room, the same one they were in, two years prior. Although completely untrue, people wouldn’t leave it alone. Then, Cheryl wasn’t sure if Toni would comment about it with her in case she heard them.

So, to answer the other dancer’s question, she nodded. It wasn’t a lie, Veronica was always like that, only ten times worse than she'd been for the past days.

“Fucking bitch.” Toni muttered, hoping Cheryl wouldn't hear her. By the smile the redhead was trying to suppress, she heard it. “So, are you ready?”

Cheryl stood up and lead them to the studio they were going to use.

~

Right. Toni did have the choreography memorized, it didn’t mean she was any good at it. That thought made her embarrassed for the first time in front of Cheryl. When she first showed the girl the Nikiya step, she was just joking, so when the redhead giggled then, it didn’t hurt her feelings, if anything it just made the ballerina sound adorable. However, Toni took that Flames of Paris variation seriously, and it would be a blow on her ego and self-confidence if Cheryl so much laughed at her. With that in mind, she couldn’t help but feel nervous as her coach for the day walked towards the stereo and turned the music on.

Toni wasn’t bad, Cheryl noticed as soon as the other girl started dancing. She lacked posture and her technique was a bit off, but that could be easily fixed with a little bit of training. If only the ballerina could bring herself to speak to the pink haired girl, it would take way less time. She wanted to, but couldn’t really do it just yet. With Veronica, it took two or three months of the raven haired dancer walking next to her, trying to make conversation, only to be met with silence and give up after Cheryl’s lack of answer, then try again the next day. There was something about Veronica that made her feel uncomfortable, always did, no matter how friendly and closer they became.

It was different with Toni. For starters, the Southsider didn’t really know when to shut up, even when Cheryl said nothing. She didn’t just give up and tried again the next day, she just kept talking and amusing Cheryl even in her worst days. Cousin Betty and Josie never tried hard enough, not that the redhead demanded such thing from anyone, she just didn’t feel drawn to talk to some people and comfortable to do so around others. Josie, Betty and Veronica were the first case, but the latter pushed herself to the second - only to ruin it with feelings and ideas Cheryl had no courage to have back in the day -, whereas Toni simply came barging in and kicking her walls down with her never ending stories, awful puns and amazingly interactive yes or no questions, causing her to want to talk to the girl more than anything. Not to mention her pretty laugh, those chocolate brown orbs that did nothing but make Cheryl want to stare at them for the rest of the day... and that perfect face.

Cheryl found herself pinching the outside of her thigh at the last thought. That deviant thought, as her mother liked to put. Imperfect, just like what she was for her parents. Damaged and beyond repair, no matter how many fouettes, pirouettes, emboîtés, arabesques and pique turns the redhead did, she was far from perfect in her parents eyes. There was nothing more she wanted than to have the same amount of love JayJay received from them directed to her. But her mother hates imperfections, therefore...

“How did it go?” The question pulled the ballerina out of her thoughts. Toni stood nervously in the center of the room while Cheryl stood in the far back, to watch all the other girl’s moves carefully. Cheryl managed to purse her lips in an attempt to smile, unable to do more than that after where her mind drifted her to. “Is it that bad?”

It wasn’t. It wasn’t an ‘oh my good it’s so good for a first practice’ either, but it wasn’t bad. Cheryl shook her head with a grimace, as if apologizing for not being able to do anything but that. Toni, although with her nerves consuming her, smiled, encouraging.

“I know it’s not really good, but at least I have it memorized, right?” The redhead nodded and walked closer to the other dancer, thinking about how to help her without being able to bring herself to say something.

Cheryl, as she’d previously told Toni through texts, had already performed that variation once, so it shouldn’t have been a surprise for the pink haired girl when the first movements were perfectly executed by her. It wasn’t Cheryl’s way of showing off, she just needed to show Toni how it was supposed to be done and what should be corrected. She tapped her thigh when she showed her leg in passé developing to the side, then back to passé, step and bourrée en couru, signaling that the girl needed to turn out more while doing that. That movement required quick and sharp en pointe hops with her base leg while the other did the movement Cheryl had just showed, and that alone was not that easy, but the redhead decided to work on what could be easily fixed first.

So she pointed out about how Toni's legs should be turned out, especially because the contemporary dancer had amazing and envy worthy en dehors that should definitely be flaunted. Cheryl, during that “private”, also helped the girl with her arms, showing how defined they should be, always following a certain invisible line, and posture, because Toni’s carefreeness made her seem too relaxed while dancing to the choreography, and, with that, in every difficult movement it was possible to see how tense her body became, bringing more attention to it. It’s not supposed to seem hard, but effortlessly easy.

After one hour of Toni trying her best to fix what Cheryl silently pointed out, only using her body to do so and succeeding, the redhead’s phone went off, signaling her ride was already waiting for her outside. Cheryl sighed, it was fun teaching Toni, even when she had to show some of the moves at least four times for the girl to understand what was wrong, and it was a bonus that she was one more hour away from home, so she didn’t really want to go just yet. But Jason had sent at least 10 messages in one minute, which meant he had better things to do that night other than patiently wait for her in the parking lot and allow her a few more minutes in her safe heaven.

“I guess our class is over tonight.” Toni pointed out, trying her best not to show how exhausted she was, and Cheryl nodded.

Exhausted was an understatement, Toni had imagined the “private" to be something less demanding, and had expected Cheryl to give up on helping her with one movement when she showed no improvement, knowing they could always go back to that later. However, she was wrong. The redhead was some kind of perfectionist, there wasn’t another explanation. She wouldn’t give up on correcting whatever was wrong, no matter how many times it took. It was helpful, but stricter than the contemporary thought it would be.

Before Toni walked to the back room to pick up her stuff, she remembered. “Hey, Cheryl. Tomorrow is your turn. Contemporary awaits us!” With a smile, she waited for the redhead to nod and exit the studio to run and grab her helmet and motorcycle keys.

~

As promised, the next day was really contemporary private day. Cheryl hadn’t been requesting too many privates with Mrs. Porter ever since the two girls started talking about helping each other with the styles they had the most difficulty in, and that itself had been making her a walking pile of nerves while in class the whole day, because she hadn’t practiced as much as she's used to. 

JayJay hadn’t helped either since, when informed about the girl’s plans to stay in the studio until late, he called her selfish, saying he wasn’t her personal driver and she should think how difficult it already was for him to maintain a relationship with Polly Cooper without the burden of being interrupted during their dates to pick her up. Aside from that, her mother had, that morning, showed her displease with the redhead, a few too many times with her hands, hence why the ballerina had chosen to wear that sleeved leotard zipped all the way up to her neck, no piece of skin showing, even though it wasn’t that cold of a day.

So it wasn’t the best day for Cheryl to show more imperfections, but Toni seemed excited at the prospect of helping her, and the girl was somehow convinced to meet her after class for them to start working on the ballerina’s contemporary skills.

“Hey, it’s just a movement, don’t think much about it, okay?” Toni tried to soothe her with words after twenty minutes of class.

The redhead was sitting on the floor trying to execute routine that required her touching the ground more than standing. Cheryl tried not to think about how awkward it looked when she saw herself in the mirror, since she had long given up of finding beauty in herself while dancing contemporary. It was probably the eighth time she attempted to do the movements, she’d given up counting after the fourth, only sighing in defeat whenever Toni would stop the song and turn it back to the beginning. Something was wrong, of course it was, but the girl couldn't really understand what it was, and all Toni instructed to do was to look at herself in the mirror and try to figure it out by herself.

There was nothing wrong with her technique, that was the first thing she noticed as she analyzed her movements. Her feet always touching the ground, her transitions were just fine and nothing seemed out of place, her hands were currently on the floor helping support her weight. It wasn’t wrong, but it felt like it. The redhead's eyes prickled with tears of frustration being formed as she clenched her jaw and her hands closed in fists, nails digging into her palm.

“Cheryl, it’s okay.” Toni walked behind her as she faced the ballerina in the mirror. “It's just a movement.” Her hands found their way to Cheryl’s shoulders before she could stop herself. “Why are you so tense?” The pink haired girl felt the knots between the redhead’s shoulders and her neck, slightly applying pressure into it, trying to ease her somehow.

A shiver ran through Cheryl’s spine at the contact with Toni’s hands massaging her shoulder. A feeling of helplessness took over her body at the thought of wasting the girl’s precious time only to fail her over and over again. 

Apparently, all she was able to do in life was fail. Fail to speak up, fail to please her parents, fail to be a good sister, fail to be a perfect dancer so she wouldn’t disappoint the first person she was starting to feel comfortable with after so many years. The sob left her mouth before she could muffle it with her hands.

“Cheryl…” Toni’s voice calmly called her, her hands never leaving the redhead’s back. “It's okay.” She soothed, only causing Cheryl to sob harder and louder - the loudest Toni’d ever heard from her - and Toni to moved herself from behind her to her side, pulling the ballerina to her embrace without thinking about all the boundaries she might have been breaking. The girl snuggled closer, her cries now being muffled by the older’s shoulder. “It’s just a silly routine.” She soothed, hugging her tightly with one arm and running her hands up and down the girl’s back with the other.

“There's no need to worry about that.” Toni kept whispering, hearing the sobs subside and transform into small whimpers through ragged breaths. “Can you breathe for me, sweetheart? In and out…” Cheryl did as she was asked to do, trying her best to calm herself down. “Good job, Cheryl. You’re doing a great job.” The Southsider encouraged, kissing her temple as an act of impulse. “It's okay. You’re doing good…”

“The routine…” Cheryl whispered, as once again her breaths became uneven, worried about the effort Toni had put into it and the disappointment she must have been feeling with the fact that Cheryl was unable to execute it.

“It’s not important, Cheryl.” Toni assured, thinking about how that should have been the last thing in the redhead’s mind at the moment, but the girl was still unsettled about it. “It's just a routine.” She spoke calmly, trying to make Cheryl understand how unimportant that was “It's not worth losing your mind over it.”

“You lost your time over it.” The ballerina retorted, her voice just as small as a whisper, as tears once again left her eyes. Toni noticed that was the longest conversation they'd exchanged face to face, without needing their phones and the comfort of text messages.

“Spending time with you is never a waste of time.” The small smile, through the tears, that formed on Cheryl’s lips only proved Toni's point. Her lips carefully brushed the redhead’s forehead before Toni kissed the spot as she cradled the girl in her arms, causing Cheryl to move even closer, resting on the pink haired dancer’s lap. “You're precious, talented and worthy.” Toni stated in a whisper, assuring the girl of her value because she seemed to forget about that sometimes. Cheryl nodded, not because she entirely believed the words that were said, but because she desperately wanted to do so.

As Toni held Cheryl close in her arms, her hands moving from the girl’s back to her arms and her mouth depositing kisses on her temple, she realized how much affection the redhead craved. Every peck made Cheryl sink further in her arms, and every caress on her back or arms made the younger girl rest her forehead on Toni’s neck, inhaling and exhaling deeply, all those actions showing how comfort she took in small displays of sympathy.

“You can’t worry too much about something as unimportant as a piece of choreography, Cher.” Toni said after a while, bringing her hand up to the girl’s bun. She carefully took one bobby pin off, surprised at how securely threaded in Cheryl’s hair it was._ It must be painful_, she thought and made a mental note to ask about that later. The more bobby pins Toni took out of her bun, the more Cheryl’s shoulders fell in something that seemed like relief. When Toni finished what she was doing, Cheryl looked more relaxed, now only with a ponytail, as if a weight was pulled from her shoulders.

“I never realized how long your hair was.” The contemporary dancer commented, admiring the red curls she had only seen tightly held in a bun before. She ran her hand through them once and heard Cheryl sigh in approval. With that, she kept doing the same thing as the redhead tentatively brought a hand to the girl’s neck, casually resting it there, sometimes running her thumb in circles in that area.

“It's ugly.” That was the third time Cheryl spoke that day, but, every one of them took Toni by surprise. Not that she would ever show, thinking about how pressuring it could be for the other girl to know she wanted more to be said. Cheryl would take her time and it was okay by Toni, as long as she felt safe and comfortable.

“What is ugly, Cher?” The nicknames came easily for Toni, she didn’t even think much of it and saw that Cheryl also looked okay with that.

“Me.” The redhead explained, taking her time to answer, as if every word leaving her mouth took an incredible amount of effort to do so. It did, Toni had no idea how much Cheryl was struggling to talk to her, after so long of not being able to do it to anyone but her brother. “Dancing contemporary. That’s what is wrong.”

“Cheryl, no.” Toni shook her head so intensely that surprised the girl curled up in her lap. “You're beautiful, while you’re dancing whatever style it is, while you're simply standing in the reception waiting for someone to pick you up, even while you’re sobbing your heart out…” She joked, making Cheryl chuckle a little. “There's nothing to do with being ugly. That’s not why I kept pausing the song.”

“But Mrs. Porter said…” Cheryl let out, her breath hitching only at the thought of the said teacher.

“Mrs. Porter is not your biggest fan, sweetie.” Toni reminded her, kissing her forehead in order to ease her mind. “Of course she would say mean things to try and make you think badly of yourself.”

“What is it, then? Why is it so bad?” Her voice, even though barely a whisper during the entire conversation, held so much doubts, so much questions she was never able to ask. And Toni felt the need to answer to all of them, whether it took one minute or one entire day. Cheryl trusted her enough to let the pink haired dancer hear her nearly inaudible voice, Toni would make sure she could trust her for everything else.

“It's not bad! It’s not bad at all.”

Toni wasn’t even lying for the girl’s sake. Her movements were extremely consistent, grounded and neat. And that’s why she understood why Cheryl couldn’t really see what was wrong. She’d seen the redhead dance - truth be told, she sneaked into the room above studio B, which had a see-through glass, right after the first time they’d met. Mesmerized is not even the word to describe how Toni felt when watching Cheryl dance Nikiya with so much passion and perfection -. She knew the ballerina had it in her to be a great contemporary dancer, that’s why she offered to free her from the claws of that abusive private coach she had and help her with her abilities in that style of dance. Cheryl only failed to understand that whatever makes a classical piece beautiful is not the same of what makes a contemporary one just as pretty.

“It's too perfect.” The pink haired girl tried to explain, knowing that such thing shouldn't be taken as a negative comment. “It's just… automatic.” She said, and, knowing it might seem like an offense for classical dancers, she completed. “Not that classical ballet is anything near automatic. It takes too much discipline and hard work to make all those movements seem effortless and gracious, and move people on top of it all. But classic and contemporary are two different styles and not necessarily what takes to be moving in one is the same thing as the other. Hard work and practice are important in both of them, but the delivery isn’t the same. The way both are seen shouldn’t be the same, otherwise there would be no point in having more than one style of dance.”

“I know that.” Cheryl spoke weakly, as if all the words spoken before, alongside all the cries and sobs tired her and she could barely keep talking. “It's just hard.”

“I know it is. And I know you must have heard that a lot of times, but all you need to do is let go. You’re executing everything meticulously, worrying too much about it, even though you already have the necessary technique, when all you should be doing is making the choreography yours. Using your body to print your name on it.” Toni grabbed the girl’s hand, the one that rested on her neck and brought it to herown mouth, kissing the redhead’s knuckles before speaking again. “Although it’s hard, I’m here to help you. And I won’t leave you alone, okay?”

Cheryl nodded, too exhausted to say anything else, but grateful for the words she’d heard that day. Also grateful for the words she’d spoken, unsure of how she was able to bring herself to speak that much without throwing up in nervousness, or even hyperventilate. The safety and comfort Toni provided had everything to do with that, she was sure.

“It's getting late, would you like me to text someone to pick you up?” Toni asked, seeing Cheryl close her eyes and suppress a yawn. Their bags were right next to them, and it was easy for Toni to grab their phones from them.

“Jason.” The redhead muttered, letting out a yawn she’d tried to suppress before. “My brother.” They’d had a fight in the morning, but he would pick her up. He always did, no matter how mad they were at each other.

“Right on, beautiful.” Toni said, already texting the boy. Cheryl nodded, closing her eyes once again, taking more comfort in Toni's arms and in hopes to rest a bit before Jason arrived.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, yeah, did I say weekly updates? I may or may not have unintentionally lied lol sorry, they are just not that possible at the moment. but I'll try to update as soon as possible, always!!
> 
> and next chapter has a few new things and chapter six is where things are completely rewritten so... I can't wait to post them :) 
> 
> for now, see you next time :)
> 
> you can follow me on twitter @bckwrds101


	5. Chapter 5

“I talked to someone today.” Cheryl blurted out, laying down on Jason’s bed while he iced an injure he'd gotten during football practice earlier that day.

“What?” Jason almost dropped the frozen peas he was holding in surprise. Penelope would kill him if she saw that the food was being used as a medical help, but it's not like Cheryl would ever tell. “Cher, that’s great.”

Cheryl sighed. Great is hardly how she would define it. She had imagined, of course, how things would be when she talked to Toni for the first time, and a major breakdown over a simple choreography was not in that picture.

“Yeah.” The girl decided to agree. Although her twin could see that it was probably not as good as he first thought it was, he didn’t comment on it.

“Who is it?” He asked, curiosity getting the best of him after a few moments in silence. “That 'peasant' girl?”

“Don't say that!” Cheryl scolded, looking at her brother as if he were the meanest person in the word. “You don’t even know her!”

Jason laughed at his sister’s words of protest. She clearly didn’t remember the day she stormed inside his car, not a greeting or anything, and suddenly started complaining about some girl choosing ‘peasant’, or whatever it was.

“I'm not calling her that, Cher. Have you forgotten? You were distressed because some friend of yours chose something called ‘Peasant'… I’m guessing it’s something dance related.” The redheaded boy explained, laying on his bed right next to Cheryl.

“It's a variation.” The girl said with a relieved sigh. For a moment, she thought Jason had discovered everything about Toni, including the fact that the pink haired dancer was from the southside, and was calling her a peasant out of prejudice. “And you’re my only friend.” She reminded him, ignoring the pang in her chest as she said those words.

“Maybe you should change that…” Jason wasn’t stupid, he could see her sister struggling a lot over the years, over various issues actually, and he knew she wasn’t as indifferent to loneliness as she pretended to be.

“Why?” Cheryl snapped, in her high pitched voice he’d barely heard the past few weeks. Her eyes showed nothing but betrayal as she said the next words. "Because you'd rather be on dates with Polly Cooper than listen to your troubled sister talk about the fact that she’d just talked to someone new in over two years.”

If Cheryl was being honest, she saw it coming. The day not even her brother would bother to be by her side, when everyone she loved would abandon her and she would have no one, just like her mother had warned a few years before. So it shouldn't really hurt to say what she did, because it was something expected to happen, but it hurt nonetheless. Knowing the only person she could bring herself to talk to would rather be talking to a pretty girl with sparkly eyes and a positive attitude.

“Of course not, Cheryl.” The boy denied, shaking his head so hard he accidentally dropped the frozen peas package on his knee. "You know I can listen to you whenever you have something to say, which, may I add, have been less than usual.” He continued, with a sad chuckle. "I’m starting to get a taste of how people feel like around you.” Whenever his sister closed herself off, nothing good really happened, Jason remembered, with a sigh. “But that’s not what we should be focusing on. I said you should change that because ever since that incident with Veronica…” Cheryl flinched at those words, a pained look gracing her features. “You've been really lonely.”

“I don’t need anyone to fill that awful excuse of human being’s place.” Being defensive wasn't going take Cheryl anywhere, but she couldn't help but cross her arms and glare at him. Her eyes softening before she stated “And if it’s worth anything, Toni is nothing like that fake viper.”

“That's even better. I’m not saying you need someone like Veronica. Lord help you, you need someone way different from her.”

“I don’t need anything.”

Cheryl needed so many things she couldn’t even bring herself to make a list, afraid to never stop if she ever started writing it down. And afraid to be brought to a worse place than she was, seeing all those things she lacked and how not even all the money in the world could make up to that.

“When was the last time you went to Pop’s?” Jason asked, as if trying to make a point.

“Last Thursday after dance. You took me there, remember?” Her answer was almost automatic.

It’s not like she closed herself off to life in civilization. She went to dance, had a phone, texted Toni, watched dance videos and went to Pop’s with Jason, the last being the most social demanding activity on the list, other than having to deal with all those people on dance class trying to hear her voice - a girl once tried to pull her bun in order to make her scream in pain-, so Cheryl didn’t really see anything wrong with that. Jason sighed, although he knew deep down his sister wouldn’t understand what he meant without a little push.

“Let me rephrase that: when was the last time you’ve been to Pop’s with a friend? Two years ago?” He asked, remembering how she and Veronica used to hang out in Pop’s after every competition. By the look on the girl’s face, that’s also exactly what she was thinking about "A little more than that?”

“You're being unfair, you are my friend.” Cheryl protested weakly, her will to talk to him long gone.

“No, I’m your twin brother.” This time, Jason corrected, seeing his sister turn her back to him to seem indifferent to that statement. “That's even more than a friend could ever be.” He continued, trying fix the words he said before. "But it doesn’t mean you can ignore the fact that you need other people in your life. And what if that Toni girl is a good person to have around?”

“Right. Whatever.” Cheryl closed her eyes, too tired to go to her own bedroom and too overwhelmed to continue the conversation. The next day she would see Toni and she had no idea what to do. She also knew her mother would scold her for sleeping in Jason’s bedroom instead of her own in the morning, but she hoped she could just take a nap and go to her bed before the dawn.

“Cher?” Jason called, knowing his twin was already drifting off and with no intentions of going to her own bedroom. “Does she know about the incident? With Veronica?” The way he asked was cautious, like it’s always been every time the redhead boy tried to mention the topic.

“No, JayJay. I’ve said more than one word to her today, it’s not like I’m going to tell her the entire shit show that has been my attempt of having a best friend.” Cheryl, however, didn’t even flinch, not opening her eyes to give him that bitter answer.

“That means she doesn’t know about The Sisters, then…?”

With that question, Cheryl stood up from her spot on the boy’s bed and left the bedroom, not uttering a single word.

~

“Hi, Cher.” After a long time debating, Toni decided that was how her interaction with Cheryl was going to start. It always started with a greeting, obviously, but this one held other intentions. To gauge whether the girl was going to say something or not.

Cheryl looked at her with those widen brown eyes, not saying a word and not offering any reaction either, just staring at the pink haired girl. There was a lot she wanted to say, but as soon as she remembered what happened the day before a lump closed on her throat, her chest tightened and all she could hear was her heart pounding. Toni was the nicest and most patient person she had encountered lately, there was no reason to be nervous about the previous day breakdown, she wasn’t Veronica or any other girl looking for some gossiping subject, Cheryl told herself, it’s just her and Kate in the reception, it’s okay, she tried to force her mouth open. The redhead’s breath hitched as she turned around and ran to the nearest bathroom, preparing herself for whatever nervous reaction she was about to have.

Apparently, talking to Toni wasn’t the number one priority on Cheryl’s list, the contemporary dancer realized, and leaving her alone was probably the best option. However, Toni didn’t like the way Cheryl looked distressed, and, although she didn’t want to pressure her into saying anything, she wanted to be there in case the younger dancer needed her. With that in mind, she followed her to the restroom, opening the door slowly, only to see the Blossom standing in front of the mirror, her eyes looking down at the water running from the sink as her hands gripped its borders.

“Cher...?” Toni called, gently, not getting any closer, but offering the softest smile in case the redhead decided to look up at the mirror and see it from the reflection. She did, and her haunted eyes said more than any words could possibly do. “Hey.” The pink haired dancer approached. “It’s okay. You don’t have to...”

Cheryl nodded, understanding the girl’s words without even hearing them completely. She knew what Toni was about to say. There was no need for her to say anything, no pressure. The ballerina forced her sweaty palms to loosen the grip on the sink and put them under the running water as Toni got closer, standing beside her with a comforting smile.

“Nervous, aren’t we?” The Southside let out a chuckle at her own attempt to lift the mood and Cheryl offered her the first smile of the day. “If it’s because of our ballet private later, don’t worry, I don’t suck as much as I did the first time.” She joked while the ballerina grabbed some tissues to dry her hands and exhaled what sounded like a nervous laugh. Toni hadn’t even sucked that much in that first practice.

“Y-you didn’t.” Cheryl managed to let out in an almost inaudible whisper, making Toni smile.

“You’re being kind, Red.” She answered with a playful eye roll.

Unable to say any other words at that time, the ballerina pursed her lips and shook her head, trying to convey the fact that Toni wasn’t that bad. Toni looked at her and shrugged. Her improvement, or lack of it, was going to be shown later that day, after all their classes together. First Cheryl’s privates, then contemporary, then hip hop, which, surprisingly, the redhead succeeded at, although needing to let go a bit more, and lastly ballet.

Cheryl managed to stop thinking about Toni and the incident the day before in order to focus entirely on her classes. She was good at that, so it didn’t take much for it to happen. Toni, on the other hand, couldn’t help but search for the ballerina in every class, watching her carefully, worried as she remembered the tension and distress Cheryl had showed the day before.

During contemporary, Toni could barely focus on her own movements, looking at the redhead executing hers with grace but no feeling whatsoever, although clearly tense, the redhead wouldn’t show it in front of a full class, and the pink haired girl soon realized that. By the time their last class was happening, Toni was barely worried anymore, seeing the other dancer excel in every other lesson they’d had that day was enough not to make her apprehensive. Whatever happened the day before, was clearly a one time thing, a very intimate one that Cheryl wouldn’t dare to show to anyone else but Toni.

~

“Well, Bombshell, I’m ready to blow your mind with my amazing en dehors.” The pink haired girl announced as she walked into studio B. Cheryl giggled at the silly nickname, but said nothing, raising her eyebrows suspiciously. Toni’s en dehors were what she struggled the most with last time, even if her turn outs were pretty good when she put enough effort into them.

“Speaking of blowing minds, when will I see you dance?” Toni decided not to mention how she’d seen Cheryl’s private the first day they met, figuring it would sound a bit creepy. “You said you’re practicing two variations, right?” Cheryl nodded with a small smile, almost imperceptible if not observed by the southsider, already walking to grab her phone beside the speaker. “What’s the second one?”

Before Toni could even elaborate further, a well known music bursted through the speaker, a music that any dancer could recognize. The contemporary dancer’s first thought was about how bold Cheryl was to choose that exact choreography to rehearse on her own, but as soon as she saw the ballerina executing the movements, that thought was erased from her mind. Of course Cheryl Blossom could rehearse the Black Swan variation on her own and succeed.

Mind blown couldn’t even describe how Toni was even feeling at the sight of Cheryl dancing in front of her. Her turns flawlessly executed and her lines so beautiful the pink haired girl couldn’t help but sigh in wonder. And she’s not even noticing the technique all that much, but pretty sure it was close to perfection, if not perfect.

As the song came to a stop, and the ballerina stopped along with it, Toni found herself in loss of words, only able to clap with her eyes widened and shining with pride. Cheryl smile grew at the reaction the other girl offered, bowing as a proper ballerina would at the sound of applause.

“That was...” After a while of speechlessness, Toni could barely make sense of what she was saying, but she felt like having to say something. “Perfect.”

‘Far from that.’ Cheryl thought with a sigh, her smile slowly fading as she remembered after the first turns when her leg wasn’t high enough or when she lost her musicality for one count near the end. Perfection was just as far as the presentation day was close, and that thought made the redhead curse herself for choosing that variation and not going with her safe choice. She could execute Kitri with her eyes closed and no one knew about that, but instead she chose to rehearse a piece she’d never even tried before.

Shaking her head not think too much, the girl didn’t even gave Toni time to recover from seeing her dance before she ran to her phone again and put Flames of Paris on. With furrowed brows and slumped shoulders, the contemporary dancer walked to the center of the classroom in defeat. Nothing she could do would erase from her mind what she just saw Cheryl do, and not a single ballet move she executed could top the simplest ones the redhead just did, but she would try her best either way. Toni Topaz was not a quitter, and it wasn’t a ballet variation that would make her become one.

And with a few more days of private classes with Cheryl, Toni could say she wasn’t near as bad as she thought she was when it came to ballet. Or maybe it was just the encouragement she got from Cheryl every time she did something acceptable in the redhead’s standards that pushed her to be better than she realized she could.

On rare occasions, the ballerina would even offer some words of advice or even praises, but more often than not, silence was still a constant when it came to her interactions with Cheryl Blossom. Toni could see something changed after the girl’s breakdown, both of them seemed more comfortable, and, even if Cheryl didn’t speak much, when she did, her voice was still barely a whisper, it didn’t feel like her throat was closing up and her heart was about to burst from her chest.

~

When it came to the redhead’s contemporary dance, on the other hand, it wasn’t until one week before the performances were supposed to happen that a real improvement could be seen. Even if they were practicing nonstop alternately with the ballet privates. Things changed nonetheless, and it wasn’t just Cheryl’s contemporary aptitude.

Cheryl had to start the routine in first position. Her feet, that in classical ballet were supposed to be turned out, were vertically aligned with her body and her arms, usually lined and defined, rested at the sides of her slim frame. That alone made her anxious, knowing that whatever she was about to do, no matter how much she’d practiced before, couldn’t be helped by the impeccable classical ballet posture she had acquired with a lot of hard work.

Of course, her hesitation was noticed by Toni as soon as her hands curled in fists for a second, before opening flat again and wiping themselves on her shorts. The redhead’s shoulders were tense, as if the prospect of one small mistake could cause a huge break down. There was no way Cheryl would be able to do it if she didn’t relax. Therefore, before pressing play, Toni stated.

“We’re going to try something different this time. Is that okay?” Taken our of her self deprecating thoughts, Cheryl nodded, her widen eyes displaying her nervousness.

Toni pressed play and walked towards the girl, placing herself behind her. The song started, but the dance would only start after the pink haired girl’s count.

“Tap my hand if you’re uncomfortable.” The dancer warned, before placing one of her hands on her left rib cage and the other one on her right wrist. She felt the girl hold her breath for a moment, but soon relaxed into her touch. Toni’s body pressed slightly against the girl’s back, and she could notice the tension slipping from her shoulders every second they stood in position. Toni breathed right next to her ear. “Five, six, seven, eight.”

The first step of the choreography was a rond de jambe, Toni gently nudged the ballerina’s right foot forward at the eighth count, following the movement with her own leg close to the girl’s. The movement, at its end, caused them to open their legs in second position. With the hand on Cheryl’s wrist, Toni moved the girl’s arm until the hand trailed from her right shoulder to her left hand. When all her fingers touched, a sharp movement caused them to separate again and both arms opened to the sides, with palms facing forward, in second position.

Toni’s left hand never left Cheryl’s rib cage, soothingly resting there as the redhead relaxed further after each small movement guided by the older girl. It was then that Toni looked into the mirror and saw the beautiful reflection, Cheryl arms opened as if greeting the world, her head slightly falling back out of comfort, her cheeks flushed and her breathing regular, relaxed for the first time since she’d started helping the girl with contemporary, her legs in second position supported by a demi plié. Toni also saw herself, her body pressed against the ballerina’s back as her arms and feet helped her move freely, carelessly, a look of wonder gracing her features. She swore she’d never seen Cheryl more beautiful.

“You’re doing great.” Toni whispered, seeing Cheryl doing the next movement by herself, just as relaxed as before, but bolder with no need for Toni’s further guidance. It required her hips to move from left to right, sinking into the plié halfway through the move and raising after reaching her sides. There was only one more pressing matter. “Open your eyes, Cher.” The pink haired girl requested. “You’re beautiful, look at yourself.”

And Cheryl did, she opened her eyes and stared at herself in the mirror as she executed the rest of the routine, Toni never once leaving her, but not necessarily commanding her movements either. The older girl was there as a source of support, showing Cheryl she was there for whatever and how much longer it took for her to let herself enjoy that art. Cheryl let herself go, not once worrying about the perfection of the technique, she understood she had that already, she felt the song and felt her heart pound with joy at the reflection of her and Toni in the mirror, nothing but a proud smile at the latter’s face.

As soon as the song came to a stop, Toni hugged Cheryl from behind, beaming with the improvement she’d made throughout the past month, starting with a breakdown and ending with a complete and heartfelt performance. It didn’t matter if it was just a 40 seconds piece combo, what mattered was that Cheryl finally felt something while dancing it.

“You were great, Cher.” She told the girl, who quickly turned around and launched herself into the girl’s arms, a wide smile on her face.

“Thank you.” Toni heard her say. Not an uncertain and anxious whisper, but a joyful and high pitched voice. And in that moment, the dancer realized she could hear that sound for the rest of her life.

“You’re beautiful.” The pink haired girl repeated the words from a while before. Cheryl pulled her head back to look at her, smiling as a hand cupped her cheek. “All if you...” She whispered. “Sensational.” Toni breathed, joining their foreheads together.

Cheryl’s heart was about to pound itself out of her chest out of pride, out of joy, out of... affection. No resistance was offered by her when Toni pressed her forehead against hers. They both knew what was going to happen, that didn’t stop the redhead’s breath from hitching and the pink haired girl from asking.

“Can I kiss you?” The question came out of her mouth as a muttered plead.

Cheryl was about to nod as an answer when she found her voice again. “Yes. Please.”

A rush of energy went through both the girls bodies when their lips met. Cheryl had half the mind to wonder if every kiss felt like that or was it just kissing Toni, but she couldn’t focus much on the thought because as soon as the pink haired girl’s hand gently squeezed her waist, nothing else came to her but the feeling of having someone so close and making her feel so good for a change.

Toni didn’t even know if Cheryl could notice, but the redhead was slightly shaking. Out of excitement or nervousness, she wouldn’t know. All she knew was that now that her lips were on the ballerina’s, she wanted nothing else in the world but that. No one else but Cheryl. So of course she asked for entrance, as she nibbled on the girl’s lower lip, and of course Cheryl, even inexperienced as she was, complied.

If someone asked Cheryl how she’d pictured her first kiss would be, she couldn’t really answer. All she knew was how it wouldn’t be, it wouldn’t be in a cramped locker room with Veronica Lodge, no matter how big the crush she had for the girl, and she hoped it would be nothing and nowhere related to dance, because she already spent so much time in the studios that a break from there to be a normal teenage girl would feel good. However, kissing Toni in the middle of Studio B proved to be exactly what she wanted, or maybe just kissing Toni, no matter where, was.

Cheryl sighed in content as Toni’s tongue explored her mouth and the one girl’s hand gently cupped her cheek while the other held her close by the waist. The redhead knew she had her hands around the other dancer’s neck, but overwhelm stopped her from doing anything but keeping them there. Kissing Toni felt so good, the way all their interactions build up to that moment warmed Cheryl’s heart somehow, and now that they were there she never wanted to stop. It was like a movie.

_A movie._

Just like that, with one thought, one of the best experiences in Cheryl’s life crumbled. Because Sister Woodhouse’s voice announcing “Movie Time” couldn’t leave her mind now that she’d thought about it, nor could all the flashes of the movies warning about what was just happening with her and Toni, and how wrong it was. And of course the pain joined soon after, a reminder of what happened to deviant girls when behaving the way Cheryl was at that moment, so she couldn’t help but push Toni away with all the strength she was able to muster and run away, tears streaming down her face as a confused pink haired dancer was left behind.

“Cheryl! Wait!” Toni called as she saw her open the door but her words weren’t registered by the redhead, nor Toni made any move to go after her, still trying to process the haunted look she’d just seen in the girl’s face.

So the contemporary dancer just stood there for a good five minutes, inside Studio B, her swollen lips being the only proof that whatever happened was not a weird dream. She sighed, wondering what the hell had happened and how she was supposed to try and fix this mess when she didn’t even know what was wrong in first place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg hi!  
hm... hello! do people still read this story? lol  
well, anyways here's an update :) and i'm not gonna promise anything but, well, quarantine is real and it's happening so maybe i'll update more often... but, well, who knows...  
hopefully someone still reads this. and if that's the case, thank you <3 
> 
> please take care and, if/whenever possible, stay home to keep yourself and others safe :)

Toni had no idea what was wrong. Sure, they had kissed. Sure, Cheryl had run aftertwars. No, the redhead still hadn't answered any of her texts and yet they were currently one hour and a half away from the recital. All the dancers were being visited by their friends and family before they entered backstage to put their costumes on.

Still, Toni had no idea what was wrong. That was... until she “met” Penelope Blossom. 

"Are you nervous, Cher?" She overheard someone ask. Looking at her left side, Toni spotted a boy, a redhead boy, smiling at the girl she was currently thinking about. 

Jason. They looked alike, from what Toni could see. Or maybe it was just the hair. Either way, he looked young, and happy, and carefree. Whereas Toni looked at the girl by his side and saw a pile of nerves and anxiety. Cheryl looked so pale, Toni thought she was about to pass out, or throw up. Maybe both.

Cheryl nodded, for what Jason offered her a sympathetic smile. Toni wondered if she was also quiet when she was with her brother or was it just because of all the people they had around them. It was probably the latter.

The simple nod seemed to satisfy the boy, who was about to say something else to fill the silence when Toni saw a hand wrapping around the girl’s arm and shoving her forward slightly, unnoticeably for those who weren’t paying attention. Toni was, so she was about to jump on whoever did that and tell them to apologize.

She looked up to the source of that act and saw a lady, red hair, harsh eyes and a scowl on her face, as if she’s always disgusted at the world around her. Toni heard her hiss.

“He asked you a question, Cheryl.” The grip on Cheryl’s arm got tighter and a grimace slightly appeared on the younger girl’s face, before her expression returned to a blank one. “And why on Earth would you be nervous to dance such a ridiculous choreography like Black Swan? You’ve danced worse, way more difficult variations. All you need to do is not mess everything up as you usually do with your turns.”

There was no way Cheryl could mess things up, especially her turns, not with that focus and technique. Toni knew the only way for the redhead to make a mistake was if she let herself get lost inside her head. Cheryl was practicing two variations, that alone was a display of dedication and great ability. And her technique was beyond all the other girls’ in the studio. If she couldn’t do something, no one else could.

“That was harsh.” Sweet Pea said, pulling Toni’s thoughts away from that family conversation. Apparently, both Sweet Pea and Fangs, who were there to watch her perform and cheer for her, were paying attention to the interaction as well.

“Tell me about it.” She replied, turning back to her friends, gritting her teeth not to walk up to that awful woman and give her a piece of her mind. How could someone say and act like that towards their own child? Cheryl definitely didn’t deserve that. 

Maybe that’s one of the reasons why the ballerina was the way she was…

“You’re ready for the big day, Tiny?” Fangs asked, probably trying to drive their attention from that family near them. For some reason, the boy she saw as a brother seemed to be extremely nervous for her. He probably was, being aware of what was at stake...

“It’s just a performance, Fangs. It’s not that important.” Toni said. She was actually trying to calm herself and him down other than shrug off Fang’s question. The less nervous her friends were for her, the less she would be, hopefully. 

Granted, they were way more supportive than Cheryl’s family seemed to be. Which was a shame, considering how talented and hardworking the redhead really was. She deserved all the support she could get.

Still, Toni was a nerve wreck. She didn’t really want to admit that, but she was. That’s why she had to excuse herself to go to the toilet the moment they announced the dancers had twenty minutes left before having to enter backstage. Cheryl’s family was already gone, she could notice, but the redhead was still on the same spot as before when Toni walked to the restroom.

When she entered the bathroom, Toni saw Veronica Lodge talking to two of her minions as she applied her lipstick. The raven haired girl exchanged glances with her, but barely acknowledged her presence out loud, choosing to brag about her variation choice and her make up to Tina and Ginger, who nodded eagerly and said words of praise to get into the girl’s good side. Toni was probably already on her bad side, considering her affiliations with Cheryl… well, her previous affiliations with Cheryl, she didn’t know where they stood anymore after the kiss.

When Toni left her stall, Veronica was already gone, and the restroom was finally empty. She looked at herself in the mirror and took a deep breath. She wanted to impress everyone, it was not time to think about Cheryl Blossom, the kiss they’d shared, the way the redhead's family treated her or anything else. It was time to focus on her performance and her performance only. She knew whoever did good there had great chances of dancing their solos at the competitions.

And competitions meant scholarship opportunities. And scholarship opportunities meant being away from her uncle and everything else that came along with having him as her legal guardian. 

It, sadly, also meant being away from her family, her real family, and her friends, but she was sure they were going to be happy for her. Everyone wanted a better life for Antoinette Topaz.

What Toni didn’t expect, when she left the restroom, was to find Fangs and Cheryl talking. Well, more like Fangs talking and Cheryl nodding, but she was actually able to see the redhead open her mouth and say - probably mutter - something. Whatever it is that she said, made Fangs chuckle as he replied, causing Cheryl to shake her head with a smile on her face. 

That pure sweet smile that Toni had learned to cherish and adore. 

Honestly, it wasn’t a surprise to her. Fangs had his way of making people smile with no effort, but she couldn’t stop herself from feeling a pang of jealousy in her heart. She wanted to be the one making Cheryl smile that way, making all the redhead’s worries disappear.

But it wasn’t time to think about that. Toni had to focus on her performance.

“What are you looking at, Tiny?” Sweet Pea asked, scaring Toni as he nudged her with his elbow. He was carrying two soda cans and a bag of popcorns.

“You know you’re not allowed to eat inside the theater, right?” Toni deflected.

Unfortunately, Sweet Pea saw right through her. “That doesn’t explain why you’re here and not over there with Fangs. Also, we’re going to eat here in the lobby before we go in.”

“That’s Cheryl.” Toni said, as if it explained everything.

Only it didn’t, because Sweet Pea knew she was talking to someone, but she’s not sure she’d ever given them names. Clearly she hadn’t.

“The ballerina.” She added, and saw realization hit Sweet Pea right in the face.

“She doesn’t really look friendly.” It was the first comment he made, causing Toni to smack his arms and almost make him drop the food and drinks in his hands.

Cheryl wasn’t unfriendly. She was just misunderstood. It wasn’t her fault, Toni could see clearly after the family interaction she’d just witnessed. With that nightmare of a mother…

“She’s really sweet!”

“Of course you would say that.”

“Well, Fangs seems to think the same.” Toni said, hating herself for how bitter she sounded. She just wanted to be the one making Cheryl smile, was that too much to ask?

As if on cue, Fangs did whatever he thought a ballet move was and Cheryl giggled, only causing Toni to sulk further. 

“Someone’s jealous.” Sweet Pea said. Clearly, he was teasing her. Little did he know, his statement wasn’t really far from the truth. 

“As if.” She scoffed, causing him to let out a loud laugh, bringing the attention of a lot of occupants of the lobby to them. Cheryl and Fangs being two of those. 

Toni, despite trying her best not to feel hurt by the blank expression on Cheryl’s face as they exchanged glances, nudged her best friend and shushed him. Not the time for a southsider to be a southsider, she thought. 

When Fangs noticed both his friends were back, Toni saw him motioning Cheryl to follow him, but the redhead shook her head and pointed at the door leading to the backstage. Toni wasn’t sure if it was because the ballerina had seen her or if she just needed to go inside for a pre-performance ritual or something… She believed it was the first choice, from the look Cheryl had given her as soon as their eyes met, but she couldn’t blame herself for trying to believe it wasn’t that. She desperately wanted to believe Cheryl just couldn’t be there with them because she had something really important to do or whatever.

“Why the long face, Tiny?” Her best friend asked, stealing some popcorn from the bag. Toni huffed and rolled her eyes, not really wanting to explain it - barely knowing how to do so, if she was being honest -. 

“You were talking to Toni’s girl, dumbass.” Sweet Pea handed him one of the sodas he was holding and Fangs shrugged.

“She looked like she needed someone to talk to her.” He said. “After her family left, I was kinda sure she was about to throw up.”

With a mother like that… no wonder.

“I would too, if my mother were like hers.” Sweet Pea commented what probably the three of them were thinking. “Did you see the way she gripped Toni’s girl’s arm?”

“Stop calling her ‘my girl’.” Toni protested, although that wasn’t really a nickname she found herself seriously opposed to. If only it were true…

“Yeah! Her name’s Cheryl.”

Toni looked at Fangs with a raised eyebrow at the same time Sweet Pea asked how he knew that.

“That’s how you start conversations, isn’t it?” He shrugged, taking a sip of his soda before continuing. “You tell people your name and you ask theirs.”

“And she answered?” Toni asked, her eyes widened in shock as Fangs shrugged once again.

“Well, it took me three times to figure out her voice wouldn’t come out any louder and one attempt of reading her lips. But yes.” He said. “She answered.”

“What? She doesn’t talk?” Sweet Pea let out another laugh, for what Toni once again nudged him harshly.

“That’s not something to laugh about, asshole.”

“That’s right, Sweets. Bad move.” Fangs added. “Besides, she’s really sweet.”

Another pang of unexpected jealousy hit Toni, and although she tried her best to conceal it, the boys noticed. A few grins were exchanged between them when Toni closed her hands in fists twice, trying to keep the anger off her face.

It wasn’t their fault that Cheryl had chosen to ‘talk’ to Fangs. Toni herself knew how hard it was for people not to do so. She also tried to tell herself other interactions were good for Cheryl, and it would be great if she could have one more person to rely on. The jealousy only came because Fangs did something she was currently unable to do.

For reasons she didn’t quite understand.

“Aw. Tiny likes her.” Fangs pulled her out from her thoughts with that comment.

All Toni could do was roll her eyes as her friends started a series of teasing and laughter at her cost. 

“I hate you all.” She said, mainly because she couldn’t really deny Fangs’ first statement.

“Well, you know who you don’t hate?” Sweet Pea teased. “Your ballerina girl.” 

Before Toni could answer, however, Miss Hearthorne appeared by the door to call all the dancers still outside to the backstage. The pink haired girl had time to - discreetly - flip them off before offering Miss H. a smile and getting inside.

“Knock’em dead, Tiny.” Sweet Pea howlered, to what she heard Fangs reply with “I don’t think it’s a competition, Sweets.”

If definitely wasn’t a competition.

But if it were, Cheryl would have destroyed them. Both her performances were absolutely flawless. To Toni’s dismay, the ballerina had decided to forgo the contemporary style to do a jazz solo. Which she crushed, as always.

But Cheryl dancing her Black Swan variation... that was what put Toni in a state of shock. It still made no sense to her how could someone be that good in such a difficult art as ballet, how could someone have that much discipline. It made even less sense to her now that she’d seen that small - and seemingly meaningless - interaction between the girl and her mother. That hideous woman sounded as unsupportive as a mother could - but definitely shouldn’t - be.

And still, Cheryl danced perfectly, making Toni and everyone else watch in awe and clap like seals when the final note was played and the ballerina finished her variation on the ending pose.

Even after the clumsy kiss, after no interaction with Cheryl for days, after having her texts ignored, Toni felt herself falling deeper. For reasons she couldn’t quite point out, or simply didn’t want to. Sweet Pea and Fangs would say she was whipped, and maybe she was, it’s hard for her to deny. Especially when Cheryl looked so amazing doing what Toni was sure she loved.

With a sigh, the pink haired girl kept clapping as the ballerina left the stage. Toni just hoped Cheryl could notice how much she was charmed by the girl’s performance, just like everyone else.

Cheryl was definitely dancing her solo for the next competition season. Toni just had to make sure she herself didn’t lose focus and miss the opportunity to dance hers as well. All the feelings she had for the redhead would have to wait, all the questions and doubts as well. It was her time to dance and show how much her classical abilities had improved.

And if she lowkey wanted Cheryl to notice that and realize she was one of the reasons for that improvement… well, no one could really blame her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once again: take care and be safe :)
> 
> thank you for reading! i hope everything and everyone is okay <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another week another update lol weekly updates, hopefully? hopefully! 
> 
> anyways, enjoy this chapter, it's my favorite one so far :)

“Know any constellations, Red?” Toni asked as soon as she parked her bike near SweetWater River’s shore, spotting the girl’s red hair even in the dark of night. It had been two weeks since the fateful day both girls had interacted last, ending with a crying and running away Cheryl and a confused Toni.

The Blossom had been, for the past fifteen days, ignoring Toni as much as possible, avoiding taking a place next to her on the barre, staying away from the lockers during their breaks, even going out of her way to be near Betty and Josie whenever the pink haired girl was around. 

So, nothing had really improved after the recital, because saying Cheryl had given room for improvement would be a lie. Toni is not even sure if the ballerina had watched her dance that night, or if she'd chosen to leave early, given how she hadn't spotted the redhead - nor her family - at the lobby after everything was over, and hadn't had much time to look for her at the aisle while she danced. 

Did she wish Cheryl had watched her and had seen how much better she was at ballet because of their privates? Yes, for sure. Did she do an amazing job nonetheless and was almost certain at least a contemporary solo she was going to be given for the next competition season? Definitely.

It wasn’t until fifteen minutes before Toni arrived at the River that everything changed and, surprisingly, Cheryl was the one to initiate the contact. By sending her a random location through text while the southsider was hanging out with the boys at the Wyrm. With no understanding of what was happening whatsoever, all Toni could do was send her a question mark as a reply, although her heart did beat a few times harder in her chest just because of the name displayed on the screen. All she got as an answer was a ‘can you come?’, followed by a ‘please’ that didn’t even need to be sent (because Toni would have gone either way).

So that was where she found herself after riding her bike as fast as she could, asking Cheryl the most random question, just because the sky looked so beautiful as she walked towards the redhead, only to be greeted with silence. She sighed. Silent Cheryl it would be for the night, not that she would mind, having Cheryl by her side after two long weeks of distance was enough for her, even if she had to fill the blanks of the conversations by herself. “Orion is the only one I could show you, but I’m unable to find it today.” Toni said, after she approached the girl, knowing she probably wouldn’t get any answer. 

However, to the southsider’s surprise, as soon as she sat cross legged by the younger dancer’s side, a few words were muttered.

“Scorpio is in the sky.”

The redhead sat on the grass, arms holding her legs, looking down as her chin touched her knees. If Toni and Cheryl weren’t the only people crazy enough to be out there at that time of the night, she would have thought it was someone else speaking, not Cheryl, from how whispered the words were and how detached they sounded. Like she wasn’t even there.

“What was that, Cheryl?” Toni didn’t really understand what was said, and was probably pushing her luck by asking something other than a yes or no question, especially after so much time without interacting with the ballerina.

“Orion boasted that he could kill any creature on earth. Gaia didn’t like that, of course she didn’t.” Once again, Cheryl surprised her by speaking a bit louder this time, loud and clear, actually, no hesitation and barely any time to breathe. “So she created Scorpio, that, as you can guess, was a huge scorpion.” She kept telling the story, not giving Toni the opportunity to interject, or comment, or do anything other than silently observe as she unloaded all those words at once. “And Scorpio killed him.” Toni obviously realized those the longest sentences Cheryl had spoken ever since they met, and would definitely not stop her now that she’d started.

“But there was Artemis, who was Orion’s friend, or lover, or whatever, and asked Zeus to place him among the stars. He complied. However, he did the same to Scorpio. But they’re on opposite sides.” With an ending sigh, the youngest finished her story, explaining what she’d firstly said. “That’s why you can’t find it today. Scorpio is in the sky, which means Orion is hiding.”

For a moment, the contemporary dancer only stared at the girl by her side. Her mouth slightly opened and her eyes shining with amusement. Cheryl was a smart one, of course she was.

The teller of the story, however, remained still after she finished, in the same position she was in when Toni found her. There was barely any emotion in her face, and the identifiable one made the southsider want to reach out and hold her until the pain faded. Because that’s what she could see. Pain in heavily hooded eyes and tear stained cheeks.

“So you know about astronomy and mythology then.” Toni decided to comment, despite desperately wanting to ask what was wrong. “Impressive.” She praised with a grin.

Cheryl’s lips trembled before she spoke again. Her voice full of something Toni couldn’t really identify.

“Useless hobby, mother would say.”

  
  


“Your mother is wrong.” The oldest retorted, wondering how could knowledge of any kind be considered useless. And Toni meant what she’d said, knowing about mythology and astronomy was really something impressive, and she wished she could research more about that, if only online school, dance and being constantly locked out of her own house weren’t so time consuming.

“Hopefully about many things.” Cheryl muttered, more to herself than anything. All the harsh words she’d heard from her mother ever since she could remember echoed in her mind with Toni's statement, some of them strong enough to bring more tears to her eyes. Tears she would most definitely try to conceal in order not to break down in front of the girl by her side.

“What is that?” Just because Cheryl’d said it to herself, it didn’t mean Toni didn’t hear it. And the pink haired dancer was getting too used to hear the redhead’s voice for her own sake, so of course she had to ask.

Her question was met with silence, and to Toni, it was a way of Cheryl to make it clear that whatever it was, she wouldn’t repeat it. To be fair, it wasn’t even for Toni to hear it in first place. The redhead, on the other hand, was so lost in her own mind that she didn’t really process the other girl’s question, barely even heard it, actually, with how loud her own thoughts were.

“I have a twin.” Cheryl stated instead, all of a sudden. A hint of pride in her voice, combined with a hint of sadness.

“That’s awesome.” Toni replied, thinking about Jason and how alike they looked, they could definitely pass by twins even if they weren't, the pink haired girl also smiled at her, even though she hadn’t even looked Toni’s way ever since she arrived. She was still looking down, clearly seeing something more interesting on the grass than Toni could ever see. “Do you have that twin telepathy thing or is it just a myth?”

“It’s our birthday today.” Ignoring the question, Cheryl stated. Not in an ‘excited-today’s-my-birthday’ way, more like in ‘today’s-been-a-burden-and-I-want-to-forget-it’s-my-birthday’ way.

“Really? Cher! I didn’t know! Happy-“

“He’s celebrating. With his friends and stuff.” And, somehow, for the second time that night, Cheryl started speaking really fast, not even acknowledging Toni’s previous words. “By stuff I mean girlfriend.” She explained, dismissively, and Toni could swear she saw the girl’s hands close in fists with that statement. “Betty’s sister, Polly.” The name left her mouth as a frown reached her face and she scrunched her nose. “There’s a party somewhere.” She informed with a sigh. 

Toni took that sigh as a sign that Cheryl had stopped talking and it was time for her to give her input or say something, or even finish congratulating the girl for her birthday, since she couldn’t even do it in first place. However, as she opened her mouth to ask about the party, Cheryl showed she wasn’t done with her rant and that the sigh was just a moment to catch her breath before speaking again.

“My parents celebrated with him. A birthday dinner before he left. It was only the five of us. Mother, Father, Nana Rose, JayJay and I.” Toni had thought that she could get used to Cheryl’s voice some weeks before. And that the girl should definitely speak more, given how Princess-like it sounded. However, she was afraid the ballerina would stop speaking for good after talking so much in so little time. Either that or she would choke on her own words at some point given how fast she was speaking. “He loves peanut butter. Guess what was the cake’s flavor?”

“Peanut-“ As expected, the question was barely rhetorical, since Toni didn’t even have time to finish answering before Cheryl started again. She wondered if anyone had heard Cheryl’s voice just as much she was hearing at the moment. Unaware that Jason was probably the only one to do so, and Veronica was once close to that. 

“I’m allergic to peanut butter.” Cheryl said in defeat. “Couldn’t even eat a slice of the freaking cake. A cake meant to celebrate the birthday of my brother.” Then, raising her voice a pitch higher, she stated, as if in disbelief. “My twin brother.” For the first time that night, she looked at Toni, who had her eyes wide opened in confusion. “Does that make sense?”

It didn’t, really. Not to Toni, anyways. How come the birth of only one twin is celebrated and the other one can’t even get a taste of the cake? What kind of family did that? The same one that gave Cheryl those pained eyes and probably made her shed the tears that marked her face, apparently. Which brought Toni to the same conclusion she had last time: that woman from the recital - Cheryl's mother - must be a real nightmare.

“He got a new phone and a new laptop. Which means I got a new phone and a new laptop, only mine are not that new because they’re the ones Jason won’t need anymore, so he’ll secretly give them to me.” The ballerina said with a sigh of defeat and looked down again. Her eyes glossy due to the tears she was trying to conceal.

“Your current phone looks pretty good to me.” Toni offered, trying to somehow cheer the girl up, although she knew it was probably something that wouldn’t happen.

“That’s not the point.” The girl retorted, closing her eyes and resting her cheeks back on her knees. Her head was turned towards Toni, but her closed eyes made her unable to see the look on the serpent’s face.

“I know it isn’t.”

Cheryl’s small defeated exhale broke Toni’s heart, to the point where the latter couldn’t help but run her fingers through the birthday girl’s smooth red hair. Cheryl didn’t flinch with the touch, but her eyes snapped open and she looked at Toni for a second more before speaking.

“And now he’s out celebrating. Did I tell you that?” The redhead asked, closing her eyes for a brief second to enjoy the feeling of the older dancer caressing her hair.

“You did, actually.”

As no resistance was offered at Toni’s motion, she continued, tucking a strand of red hair behind Cheryl’s ear as the girl continued the story. A little less agitated than before, given how calm she was starting to feel with Toni so close to her.

“And when I finally opened my mouth that night to ask for permission to go with him.” The redhead exhaled soundly, as if conformed with the way things turned out nonetheless ”Well, I’m not out celebrating, so you can tell how it went.”

“They said no.” Toni guessed.

“They said nothing.” Cheryl corrected and as soon as Toni’s hand stopped for a moment, Cheryl realized how much she was relishing on that touch and how much she already missed the way it made her feel. And how much she probably shouldn’t be. Deviant.

“Cheryl I-“ 

Before Toni could offer any other words of comfort, however, Cheryl raised her head with widened eyes and braced herself a bit harder, as if trying to protect herself from a threat that Toni couldn’t possibly know she was offering. That sudden movement made the southsider’s hand drop by her side, and whilst she, at first, made a move to attempt to put it back on the Blossom’s locks, the way Cheryl flinched at the motion made her stop.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have sent the location. It was selfish of me to have done that.” Cheryl started, a bit more frantically than she wanted. Toni wanted nothing more than to soothe her with words and say that it was ok, that she shouldn’t apologize, but she was, herself, curious about the youngest actions, especially since the girl also seemed quite aware that it was strange for her to have done so “After... Well... you know.” Toni nodded. The kiss. She knew. “And we haven’t met alone ever since. And now I sent the location and you’re here and you shouldn’t be here.” There were stubborn tears forming in Cheryl’s eyes. Of regret. Of confusion. Of fear. “Why are you here, Toni?” She asked in a desperate whisper.

“I wanted to see you.” The truth slipped out of her mouth before Toni could even think about how she would phrase it. But that’s what she was feeling. The undeniable wish to see Cheryl, even if from afar, even without words exchange, even after the redhead’s reaction to their kiss. So, once Cheryl asked, of course she would have come. 

Silence reigned for a while after the confession. Cheryl too overwhelmed to offer any reaction other than shock. When was the last time someone went out of their way to see her? Just because they wanted to see her? She couldn’t think of anyone who would ever do that. Not Josie or Betty. Not Veronica when they'd once shared a friendship. Not even Jason, her twin, her soulmate - not at two in the morning during one of her outings to let her self-deprecating thoughts speak louder than the river’s flow, at least. Jason could never understand it -.

“Why did you sent me the location, though?” Toni asked, half out of curiosity, half to break the awkward silence that followed after the confession.

“I can’t stay here alone for too long, I suppose.” The redhead shrugged as she answered, Toni seeing a glimpse of deeper pain in her eyes before she spoke again “Not the best ideas come to mind.” That and she desperately wanted to see the pink haired girl again.

Toni wanted to reach out and grab the redhead’s hand, ask about all the ideas that come to her mind as she sits at SweetWater River’s shore in the middle of the night, she wanted nothing more to hear everything Cheryl had to say. However, she couldn’t ignore the way the ballerina’s eyes brimmed with tears, the way she bit her lower lip to try and stop her chin from wobbling at those thoughts that were probably tormenting her. So she did none of those things, already imagining how unpleasant those thoughts must be.

“You’re not alone.” Toni said instead, placing her hand down on the grass between her body and Cheryl’s, her palm facing upwards in an open invitation that the redhead could take or decline whenever she wanted. She expected the latter, but her face almost displayed a smile as the former happened. Almost, because Cheryl’s eyes still held so much pain, looking at her almost in despair, confusion written all over her face, that Toni couldn’t even let herself feel happy at the redhead’s hand intertwining with hers.

And all it took was one more moment of silence and Toni’s curious eyes and gentle brush of thumb on the back of her hand for Cheryl to start talking again. Breaking Toni’s heart in one hundred other million pieces.

“I feel like I’m invisible, sometimes.” Cheryl spoke, sounding calmer than she expected to be while doing that confession, but pained nonetheless “Or my existence is only a burden to those around me.” As much as Toni wanted to stop her right there to say that it wasn’t true, she knew better than to do that, and just let the redhead continue “And I can’t complain about that, because I’m invisible, and I’m alone, so who would even listen to me?” Cheryl choked on a sob and lowered her head in shame, she did not want to cry in front of Toni anymore. But Toni was gentle and brought her free hand to the redhead’s chin, raising the girl’s head again to look at her, brushing her thumb on her cheeks to wipe away the tears that fell with those last words.

‘I would listen to you.' Toni’s mind wanted her to scream that, but all she could do was try to convey that through her gestures. 

“But then I go up on the stage and everything changes, because people see me. They truly see me, and it makes it seem like there’s a purpose for my life. It only lasts for as long as the music plays, though. So that’s why it has to be perfect, because I want people to see perfection during those two minutes they decide I’m worth sparing a glance at.” 

The words came out rushed of the ballerina’s mouth, as if she were ashamed and just wanted to get over with saying them. No breathing breaks in between words, no room for Toni to offer any comfort either, just a spit of fire and pain and defeat because she truly wished things were different. And she continues, because Toni made no move to ask her to stop, and she’s been keeping it in for so long, her passion for dance, her need for perfection, so of course she would be unable to stop herself from spilling everything she’d ever wanted to say.

“Ballet requires perfection, that’s what I’ve heard my whole life. That’s what I believe in and that’s why it’s so important to me that nothing is out of place, not my attire, nor my attitude, especially not my technique.”

Toni couldn’t help but feel like Cheryl was somehow justifying herself, as if people judged her for her constant need for perfection. However, it came to the pink haired girl that just because she wasn’t one to do that, it didn’t mean other people wouldn’t do it either. And she was clearly unaware of how much people talked behind Cheryl’s back about how disappointed the ballerina seemed over anything other than perfection. She wasn’t there when people started calling Cheryl a dancing robot or something like that a few years ago, there was no way she could know that. “If I’m only seen for two minutes, I’ll make sure I’m nothing less than the best.” The redhead finished, looking somehow relieved after all the words she’d said. As if a weight was taken out of her shoulders, a burden she was clearly aware she was carrying but had no one to talk to.

“I see you, Cher!” It was the first thing Toni said after she realized Cheryl was done. She held the girl’s hand tighter, as if trying to convey the truth of her words. “You’re not invisible to my eyes. Never was. I’ve known you’re worth getting to know better ever since the first time we’ve met.” A small smile graced the redhead’s features, and Toni was sure she was too reminding herself of their first interaction. And how far they’ve come.

“And you don’t have to chase perfection around me either. You’re amazing, no matter how many flaws you see in yourself.” Toni continued, feeling like it was her time to say all she was feeling about that matter. Cheryl was talented and precious and deserving. There was no way the older girl would want her to feel any less than that. “So if you ever feel like a burden, or like the world is dragging you down, come to me, just like you did today, okay?” As she caressed the redhead’s cheeks, she felt tears once again on her fingers, but kept talking, because that was what Cheryl deserved to hear. “I’ll listen to you, I’ll help you through it. You’re not alone, Cheryl. Not ever again.” 

For the hundredth time that night, Cheryl surprised Toni. By moving forward, her body now facing the other girl’s and their faces just as close to each others' without actually touching as possible. Toni let out a breath of surprise, still cupping the redhead’s cheeks, even after the sudden motion.

“I-“ Cheryl tried to make sense of her own words before saying them. She wanted to try again, that’s what she wanted to say. To kiss Toni with no fear, no flashbacks, nothing but the best feelings the pink haired girl made her feel at that gloom starry night.

Toni knew what Cheryl wanted to do. And shared the same wishes, of course, but tried her best not to let the eagerness show as she moved her face even closer, to the point where their noses were touching. 

“I’m scared.” The whisper came out of the Blossom girl’s mouth before she could stop herself. She half expected Toni to laugh at her silliness, stand up and walk away, reason why she tried to pull her face away first, not to deal with too much rejection. The contemporary dancer, on the other way, squeezed her hand and gently held her face before she could move too far.

“You don’t have to be.” Toni whispered back, trying to smile reassuringly to the girl whose breaths were almost hitching with anxiety. “It’s just me.” She stated, moving closer and waiting for Cheryl’s reaction. Since she didn’t pull her face away, Toni tentatively brushed their lips together. “It’s just us.”

“It’s just us.” Cheryl repeated the words of assurance in an exhale, before she made the move and brought her lips close to Toni’s again.

_ Just us. _ The words echoed in Cheryl’s head as the kiss intensified, Toni gently biting on the girl’s lower lip to ask for entrance. Cheryl complied, opening her mouth to meet Toni’s once again, only in a more heated kiss.

The hand on Cheryl’s cheek moved down to the ballerina’s waist as they explored each other’s mouth, squeezing it a bit tighter when the redhead brought her free hand to the back of Toni’s neck. The contact making both girls shiver.

Toni was the first to pull back, her hand still securing Cheryl’s body as the redhead unconsciously whined when the kiss ended and moved even forward, hiding her face on the girl’s neck in embarrassment. Toni chuckled, relieved that this time, the kiss had a smoother ending.

“You’re adorable.” She commented, for what the redhead whined again in protest, not moving her head from its previous place. “Cher?” A hum was all the response she got, so Toni brought her hand to Cheryl’s face again, as if asking the girl to look at her. The redhead complied, and Toni could see she looked less pained than she was a few minutes ago.

“Happy birthday, lovely.” Toni pecked Cheryl’s smiling lips one more time before stating what for her was obvious, but the redhead clearly needed to hear. “You deserve the world.”

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay as i've mentioned, this is my favorite chapter. which means i couldn't bring myself to change it much... because i kinda really like it...? seriously, i'm never really happy about how my chapters turn out, but i was happy with this one the first time i wrote it and i'm still happy with it now so... yeah, i think that's a good thing. hopefully you don't think it's awful or whatever lol 
> 
> also, thanks for the comments last chapter, it's good to know people are still reading this :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi!
> 
> did i say weekly updates last chapter? ok, please forget that lol solely because two weeks and two days feel the same for me during this quarantine. all i can say is that i'll always try to update as soon as possible!
> 
> once again, thank you for reading.
> 
> also, i'm sorry for any mistakes. i've tried to proofread it but sometimes i just can't really spot wrong vocabulary or grammar :)
> 
> oh, and also, i think i went back to twitter? don't blame me, blame quarantine.  
anyways, it's @bckwrdslol now cause i had to make a new account so yay?

Pointe shoes hurt, Toni mused as they were finishing their group rehearsal. She wondered if it was just because she was so used to dancing barefoot, or with socks, or just flat ballet shoes that the pain for her intensified. As the contemporary dancer looked to her right side and saw Betty trying to hold back a grimace, she realized everyone was in the same pain. Good thing is they only had to dance the choreography one more time and rehearsals would be done for the day.

Cursing whoever it was that had the idea of having the group perform a classical repertoire for the next competitions, Toni widened her smile, hoped for her pain to fade and waited in her position. She spotted Cheryl waiting by the other side, looking completely unbothered, the indifference on her face contrasting everyone else’s tired expressions. Which was funny, considering the redhead was the principal dancer of the choreography and had some pretty painful steps.

“Okay, music!” Miss Hearthorne announced and everyone focused on their part for the last time of the day.

They had already cleaned the first minute, which consisted of the coryphées - Veronica and Josie -and corps de ballet entrance. Trying not to die of pain and exhaustion, all the dancers executed the bourrées en couru as Cheryl entered, gracefully. Toni smiled even more at the perfect sight of the ballerina - and at the thought that in less than a few minutes they’d be meeting each other inside the locker rooms after everyone left, as they had been doing for the past week -.

Every time Cheryl entered the stage to dance her part, Toni’s heart filled with joy. And it wasn’t because every time the principal danced, the corps de ballet had easier and less painful steps - although that fact did make her smile as well -. It was the joy of seeing the redhead dance, mainly. Even though on rehearsals, despite the correct technique and beautiful lines, Cheryl’s expression was blank, no matter how much Miss Hearthrorne yelled at her to smile, at least.

“She’s different on stage.”The teacher had said once with a sigh, and everyone had agreed, after a particularly rough training session.

So no one really bothered to correct her on her lack of expression while rehearsing, knowing she’d have what it takes on stage. Still, Toni thought, it would be nice to see a happy and joyful Cheryl dancing once in a while, before the actual performance. Because Toni was sure she’d be too nervous to even notice the redhead dancing on the actual day. So she would like to see the complete performance beforehand. She was not gonna be the one to voice that out, though.

Six minutes and a lot of Miss Hearthorne screams and corrections - that everyone was too focused on not passing out to listen to, if they were being honest - later, the dance was over. And Cheryl shot Toni the most unperceptive smile when the teacher said they could go change and go home for the day.

-

As soon as the locker room was empty, Toni heard the angelic voice she was getting used to.

“We’re lucky she didn't really choose Swanhilda and Friends.” The redhead said, her voice still not too loud, but loud enough for Toni to hear and raise an eyebrow.

“Swanhilda and Friends?” The contemporary dancer asked. She was leaning on her closed locker after changing with everyone else, and the ballerina was sitting on one of the benches, still on her leotard, since she'd had an extra half hour with their choreographer to rehearse her solo variation after everyone else left the studio.

Cheryl giggled and started taking the bobby pins out of her bun. She knew Toni loved when she had her hair down, or at least in a ponytail. “Coppelia.” The younger girl explained. “If everyone's on the verge of death with Waltz of Flowers, I can’t imagine how we would be able to manage the one Miss Hearthorne was thinking before.”

“Swanhilda and Friends…” Toni repeated, musingly. She’d seen it before, it was from Coppelia, so she obviously did, however, she couldn’t remember the steps or how difficult it was.

“A lot of entrelacé…” Cheryl reminded her, chuckling as she saw the pink haired dancer grimace. “It's really nice to dance to, though.”

A week hearing Cheryl’s voice and laugh or not, Toni didn’t think she could ever get used to that sound. Not in a year, not in ten. It was the most princess-like voice she’d ever heard, and when the redhead giggled, the world even seemed brighter. Of course, her opinion might or not be biased. Most likely it was, but it was still a nice sound.

“Is it?” Toni asked, approaching the girl and sitting by her side, helping her with the task of taking off the bobby pins. With a hum and a nod, Cheryl agreed, turning her back on Toni so the contemporary dancer could help her better. “I like it when you have your hair down.” Toni said, softly. And she couldn’t see, but Cheryl didn’t even try to conceal the big smile on her face at that.

“I know.” The redhead said, coyly, making Toni laugh.

As Toni occupied herself taking all the bobby pins out of Cheryl’s bun - if she could count, she could swear she’d have taken out at least thirty -, the latter focused on taking off her pointe shoes. Trying not to grimace or offer any reaction, Cheryl took her pointe shoes and her toe protectors off, looking at her feet and sighing. Another night with hot water and salt as her companions.

“Holy fuck, Cheryl!” Toni exclaimed as she saw the redhead’s feet. Hers were bad, she thought, one blister and two cracked nails, but when she looked at Cheryl’s, she realized the pain she felt was nothing in comparison.

“It’s not that bad.” Cheryl assured her and turned around to face the girl. “Nothing a warm bath and some rest can’t solve.”

“Don't push yourself too hard, princess.” The contemporary dancer offered and wrapped an arm around the other dancer’s shoulder to pull her close and deposit a kiss on her forehead.

Cheryl hummed and grinned, but didn't make any promises about taking it easy. How could she? When Miss Hearthorne trusted her with the principal ballerina in the group variation. When she had to set an example in the studio. When ballet was the only thing keeping her out of her house for sometimes more than twelve hours a day. When she'd given up her solo for the next competition season to pursue an impossible dream. Which reminded her…

"I have something to ask you." She started, not quite knowing how she'd explain everything that's on her mind at that moment. "Two things." She had a few things to talk to Toni about, if she was being honest, so she'd start with the easier topic. "I actually need an opinion."

"Really?" Toni asked with a smile. "Any opinion you ask, I'd gladly give you."

Ignoring the flutter on her stomach at the sight of Toni's beautiful smile, Cheryl took a deep breath, cleared her throat and started explaining things from the beginning, 

“Miss Hearthorne and I decided it would be a good idea for me to send an application to Prix De Lausanne." Toni hummed, hoping the talk was going exactly where she thought it was. "You know, you have to send the tape with recordings of barre, center, jumps, pointe work and a variation. Well, two. A classical and a contemporary." Cheryl sighed at the mention of the contemporary piece she'd sent in. "Mrs. Porter helped me with it." She answered the questioning look the dancer shot her, smiling softly as Toni displayed a grimace at the thought of the redhead taking privates with that woman.

Toni knew Mrs. Porter had something against Cheryl, for no reason at all, given how amazing, hard worker and kind the ballerina actually was. So imagining the things she must have heard from their contemporary teacher as she rehearsed a piece made her heart clench. Especially the occasion being such a stressful one.

"I would've helped." 

"I'm sure you would, but you weren't attending the studio just yet." Cheryl replied, for what Toni nodded and placed a gentle kiss on the girl's cheek.

"So...?" She asked, curious, her eyes lighting up with expectation as the redhead widened her smile. "Were you selected?"

Despite the big smile on her face, the expectant look made Cheryl's cheek blush and a small almost inaudible "Yes" leave her mouth. For what the pink haired girl screamed in joy and stood up, pulling the girl towards her and engulfing her in a big hug. 

"I knew it! I'm so proud of you, Cher!" Toni's loud cheers caused Cheryl to let out a laugh as they parted their hug and sat back down. "When you started telling me the story, I was sure you'd be selected."

Of course Cheryl would be selected. She's the ideal ballerina prestigious competitions looked for, and the ones that could definitely get in huge and famous companies all over the world. 

"Thanks, Toni." She said, shyly, ducking her head down as she proffered her next words. "I wasn't sure myself."

"Hey." Toni placed a hand under her chin and raised her face, so theirs could meet. "You are absolutely amazing. No one should tell you otherwise." 

Cheryl shrugged, a sad smile on her face. It was as if Toni knew her mother, as if she knew all the words the girl had to hear every day for as long as she could remember. All the reproving glances, the snarky remarks, the bruises she'd sometimes get on places Penelope knew were easy to hide… it was as if the contemporary dancer knew it all. There was no way she could know, but Cheryl just felt like she understood somehow.

Goosebumps ran through her skin as she remembered those not so lovely occasions, so Cheryl forced herself to smile a bit wider, not wanting to drag the conversation somewhere she couldn't mentally stand to go. Somewhere she didn't really want Toni to be either. 

"Thanks, Toni." She replied, sensing the look of the girl linger on her for a while, as if to check if that smile was really a happy one. "And as pleased as I am to share these news with you, I haven't gotten to the point I want yet."

Cheryl mentally patted herself on the back for being able to hold that conversation for so long without feeling nervous. Obviously, she wished for things to continue like that as their talk progressed, especially because she still had some other matters to discuss. For now, the redhead just wished she wouldn't stutter or tremble with nerves when asking Toni what she needed to ask.

"Which is my opinion." Toni said, carefully bringing her arms around the redhead's frame to keep her close. Even closer.

Toni couldn't really stand to be away from Cheryl for too long now that they've reconnected. Now that they've kissed and everything's going really good for them. She just wanted to have the ballerina with her all the time. That soothing presence she couldn't stay without anymore.

"Which is your opinion."

"What do you need, princess?" She asked, feeling her heart beat harder in her chest at the sound of Cheryl's adorable giggles. She could call Cheryl 'princess' forever if that meant bringing such a joyful sound from her.

"What do you think it's the best contemporary variation for me to perform there? On the actual competition?" Cheryl asked, leaning her head and resting it on Toni's shoulders.

"I..."

Sensing her hesitation, the redhead completed.

"You don't need to give me your input right now." She said. "I mean, I know it was all of a sudden and everything." For some reason, thankfully, Cheryl realized she was about to start rambling and stopped herself. She was unable to conceal the blush on her cheeks, but at least she'd managed to stop talking when she needed to. That was definitely a win for her.

"A little, yes." Toni nodded, then pecked the ballerina's forehead. Her lips lingered there for a moment, before she sighed and continued. "I have a few in mind, but I'm just worried the one I pick won't be the right one."

"I trust your judgement, Toni." That sentence made Toni smile so freaking wide, it also made the butterflies in her stomach flutter. So she held onto Cheryl a bit tighter, waiting for the girl to finish. "And I trust you. I can't think of anyone I'd listen to more when it comes to contemporary than you. Whatever you choose," she started, raising her head and initiating a kiss, catching Toni by surprise one more time. Before the pink haired girl could react to it, though, Cheryl pulled herself back with a smile on her face. "I'll go with it."

"Okay." Toni nodded, a goofy smile on her face.

"Okay?" 

"Yeah. Just give me a day so I can choose between the ones I already have in mind, yeah?"

Cheryl nodded, not quite believing it. Well, her intentions were to have Toni give her the suggestion, of course. And she was almost sure the contemporary dancer wouldn't say no to what she asked. Still, a part of her - that negative one she couldn't quite erase from her mind - believed Toni would choose not to help her, and she'd have to sort everything out by herself, or worse, she'd have to ask their hideous teacher for help.

"Thank you so much!" Cheryl didn't even think she'd be so relieved to hear Toni agree with what she asked. She was able to stop herself from rambling before, she was surely gonna stop herself from crying like a baby in relief.

So she did the second best thing she had in mind, hug Toni as tight as possible, as close as possible, to show her gratitude. The pink haired girl hugged her back, then held both the ballerina cheeks in her hand and started placing kisses all over her face, causing both of them to laugh. 

Toni was so proud of Cheryl. She knew what Prix De Lausanne meant. Great opportunities and a whole lot of new experiences. Exactly everything Cheryl deserved in this life, having worked hard for it for so long. And if she could somehow help the ballerina achieve that, she would. 

It wasn't even that hard to find a contemporary variation for her, either. Ever since they've started practicing together after class, there was just something about Cheryl that screamed 'Traces'. However, being that a big decision that could either help or harm her the ballerina in the future, the contemporary dancer would spend the entire night watching and rewatching it, to make sure that was absolutely the best choice. 

"And what's the second thing?" Toni asked as soon as they parted their hug.

"The second thing?"

"You said you had to things to talk to me about." A frown formed between her eyebrows at the sight of Cheryl's face falling, no longer displaying that adorable smile she'd learned to cherish and adore.

Oh! Right. The second thing. Cheryl gulped. Toni hadn’t let go of her yet, nor she wanted the pink haired girl to do so, but she had a sense it might happen if she talked about it. Still, with her heart beating fast and all the joy from the previous conversation gone, she had to ask.

“Our first competition is in New York…”

“It is…” Toni answered, although it wasn’t really a question.

Cheryl just stayed quiet for a moment, thinking about how to put whatever’s in her mind into words without somehow offending her friend, or whatever she was. She was thinking about it the night before and realized she had no answer for the question she needed to ask. It wasn’t even out of plain curiosity, it was just because she’d like to offer help, in case Toni needed any.

“Does…” The redhead started, but stopped herself. She really didn’t want to offend Toni. The thought of doing so already caused her hands to start shaking, along with her heart that hadn't stopped beating at a faster pace as soon as she thought about maybe ruining whatever they had with a simple conversation.

Well, not that simple, considering the redhead was walking on eggshells around the other girl, and Toni seemed as confused as someone could get. Still, it wasn't meant to be complicated. It didn't really mean that, for Cheryl, it wouldn't be.

“Cher?” Toni asked, holding one of Cheryl’s hands as soon as she noticed the change in the girl’s demeanor.

The ballerina could curse herself, had she not been thinking about not having such a strong reaction to the simple task of asking Toni a question. A question that might cause her to turn her back on Cheryl and never talk to her again. Somewhere in her mind, a voice told her she was overthinking, that a simple question couldn’t cause that - the voice, calm and carefree, with no worries in the world, sounded too much like Jason’s -. She willed herself to at least try and control her breathing as she felt Toni’s soothing hands running up and down her arm.

“Cheryl…” The contemporary dancer tried again, confused at what was going on. “What's wrong?”

“I wanted…” Cheryl started, after taking a deep breath.

“What did you want, sweetheart?”

“I just wanted to ask you something.” The redhead whines and ducks her head down, because the tears were coming.

Was there any possible scenario in her life where she would be able to talk to someone without crying or feeling like she couldn’t breathe? They were having such a nice conversation a couple minutes ago. Why did she have to ruin it like that? The tears were more of frustration than anything else. Cheryl just wanted to have a normal conversation, for once in her life.

“You can ask me anything, Cher.” Toni assured, bringing her hand to the girl’s chin to make her look up. “You don’t need to worry about it.”

“I don’t want to offend you…”

“I won’t feel offended.” The pink haired girl stated. “Cheryl, last week you and I had a great and important conversation. Which reminds me I have something for you…” She continued with a smile, and when Cheryl’s eyes sparkled with curiosity, she chuckled and shook her head. “But let’s finish this talk, okay? The fact that you don’t need to be careful to say whatever is on your mind was implied when I said you didn’t need to chase perfection around me. I said you’re not alone, and I won’t leave you alone. Okay?”

“Okay.” Cheryl nodded and smiled. It was nice being reassured. She was just not quite sure for how long Toni could take having to reassure her all the time, though.

“So what’s the question?”

“Does the scholarship you receive here cover your expenses in the competition?” The ballerina asked, too fast for Toni not to find adorable. Too nervous, so Toni held her tighter in assurance. “Because when we met…” Cheryl started to explain, and she was already regretting it. She didn’t want to throw anything on Toni’s face, but facts were facts. “You told me you were from the Southside and…well…” She decided to stop right there, leaving whatever it was she wanted to say implied.

Toni caught on to her trail of thoughts though. She spent a few seconds in silence, but still holding Cheryl to show her she was not offended, thinking about how much she was willing to tell the redhead. Thinking about a week ago when Cheryl trusted her and how the ballerina was trusting her at that moment by talking to her. So she decided right then, Cheryl needed to know.

“I'm broke, you mean.” Toni stated and laughed as Cheryl couldn’t really deny the information and just nodded. Adorable.

“I wouldn’t put it that way…” The redhead tried to fix, but Toni simply shook her head and chuckled.

“I really am, princess.” She said, simply. No hard feelings. She was definitely not mad that Cheryl brought that up, for the redhead’s relief. “But no, the scholarship doesn’t really covers those expenses…”

“I can help!” Cheryl didn’t even let Toni finish, offering what she could give right away. “Nana Rose gave me some money last Christmas. I can talk to Jason, he probably got some money for our birthday, and I can borrow it and pay him later, he won’t mind…”

“No need, Cher.” Toni interrupted Cheryl brainstorm, finding really cute the ways the girl was rambling about coming up with a plan to help her get the money. The money she already had, so there was no need for a plan at all. “My family already gifted me with it.”

It was an early birthday gift. Birthdays gifts, actually. FP Jones said he would make sure Toni could attend to all the competitions, anything to give her a path away from drug dealing or gang fights. And the other Serpents supported his decision. So, basically, Toni got to attend every competition and convention possible, the Serpents would pay for it. In exchange, she wouldn’t get any birthday presents for as many years as she danced. And she was definitely okay with that.

“That’s great, Toni!” Cheryl said, excited. “Your family seems nice…” She commented, curious to know what a family in the Southside were like. She figured they were just like any other, but it’s not like she had a good idea of how a regular family acted.

“We’re not really blood related…”

Toni took a deep breath before continuing. She just hoped Cheryl would let her explain and wouldn’t just run out of the room and stay away from her forever. Honestly, she knew that’s not something Cheryl would do.

“Southside Serpents. They’re my family!” The pink haired girl stated, proud of every word leaving her mouth.

Silence reigned for a while, but Cheryl made no move to run out the door, so Toni was less nervous than before. After a few seconds, the redhead broke the silence.

“You realize motorcycles are dangerous, right?”

Toni couldn’t help but laugh at that statement. She couldn’t help but feel relieved either, because someone as rich as Cheryl Blossom had every reason to look down on them as if they were a bunch of drug addicts and troublemakers. And still, she chose not to do that. Because the Serpents are her support system, her family, and Toni really liked Cheryl, but not to the point of letting her get away with saying bad things about them. So she was glad Cheryl didn’t do it.

“I just told you I’m part of a gang, and all you can think about is the fact that I ride a motorcycle?”

“You must have your reasons.” Cheryl shrugged, not dismissive, but surprisingly understanging. “To join a gang, not to ride that thing. That is unjustifiable!” The redhead points out, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms

“I was born into it.” Toni explained, chuckling at the pout she was just seeing from the girl. “And I’m very good at riding a motorcycle, if I must say.”

“You're careful, right?”

Carefulness is relative, Toni wanted to answer. But she knew the redhead’s pout would never fade if she did so.

“Of course, Cher!” She said, instead. “Gotta make sure I can get here in one piece and look at your beautiful face.”

“Flattery will get you nowhere, Antoinette Topaz.” The redhead glared, but the grin forming on her face said otherwise.

“What about a late birthday present?”

Cheryl’s eyes sparked with excitement. A birthday present? When was the last time she actually got something for her birthday that had nothing to do with Jason giving some of his things because he got better ones? She couldn’t really remember.

Toni smiled and took out a small box from her bag, handing it to the ballerina and waiting for her reaction. It wasn’t much, actually, but she thought about what would be the best gift, and she simply couldn’t think of anything else to give Cheryl when she saw that in a store two days before.

“Toni…” Cheryl opened the box. She was nearly beaming as she stared at the present in awe for a few seconds. “It's so pretty!” She said and raised her head to give Toni the most beautiful and radiant smile. “Thank you!"

Carefully, the redhead took the present out of the box. It was a sparkly crystalized flower crown, with a rose gold wire and ivory flowers. A ballet bun accessory, actually. Those ones she loved to wrap around her bun to make it even more perfect.

“You deserve the world, as I’ve said before.” Toni stated with a grin, seeing how happy Cheryl looked. “But since I can’t physically give you that, I suppose a ballet related gift would be appropriate.”

“That's cheesy, TT.” Cheryl laughed and quickly pecked her lips.

Toni had no idea where that nickname came from, and she was sure that if Sweet Pea and Fangs heard it, they would never stop teasing her for it. She liked the way it sounded coming from Cheryl, though, and she loved the fact that the redhead seemed to trust her enough to give her a nickname. So TT it would be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first of all, thank you for reading!
> 
> okay, so here's where the explanation starts. if you don't really care much for ballet or competition stuff, you may not care much for this complementary information:  
Prix de Lausanne is a HUUUUUUUUUGE competition for ballet dancers. I consider that and Youth America Grand Prix (YAGP) the most prestigious ones - I actually think most people consider those two as the best ones, but I can't speak for everyone so I'll just say that I consider them like that. does that make sense? anyways... -. so you apply, you're selected, you go there, you take AMAZING CLASSES - that are actually on youtube, if anyone's interested -, and you compete. you perform and, if you're one of the finalists, you perform again and you get the chance to win scholarships... like really good ones, sometimes for American Ballet Theatre, Stuttgart Ballet, The Royal Ballet and some other very prestigious companies.  
ah! and also, you must compete with a contemporary variation and a classical ballet one.  
anyways, if you like ballet dances and stuff, go to Prix de Lausanne youtube channel. they post all the competitors' dances and everything, so it's really nice. and if you'd like to watch or know more about ballet variations (contemporary ones as well), that's a good way to do it :)
> 
> if you read this entire thing, you're amazing <3
> 
> other than that, I hope you're all well and you're all staying safe <3


	9. Chapter 9

It was almost winter break, which meant the dancers were working extra hard, because competitions would start the following month and, although all the group choreographies and solos seemed fine and clean enough, the teachers were not satisfied.

Toni couldn’t wait til she could just relax with her friends during the break, even though she had a solo to perform that competition season. She was confident, it’s contemporary. She knew she was good at it. All the pink haired girl thought about were game nights at Fangs’, crushing Tall Boy and Hog Eye at pool and sleepovers at Pea’s.

If there was one thing Toni was certain, was that her uncle would be home for break as well, and she’d rather avoid any interactions with him until she secured a scholarship somewhere else and could leave his trailer - it had never been hers, had it? - for good.

So, surely, the thought of taking a break from pointe shoes and Tchaikovsky for two weeks brought a smile to her face. But the sight of Cheryl rehearsing 'Traces', the contemporary piece Toni had picked for her, definitely contributed to the dancer’s joyful expression. Even if Cheryl looked not as happy, unfortunately.

“It does look great, Cher.” She said as soon as the song ended and the ballerina clearly searched for approval in her face. “Really!” Toni reassured, and Cheryl grimaced.

“It's prettier when you dance it.” Cheryl said, through ragged breaths. It was a fast paced choreography after all. Toni smiled and shook her head, handing her a bottle of water.

“It's pretty when you dance it too.” Cheryl was drinking her water, but Toni noticed a shrug and a slight roll of eyes from the redhead. “You can hardly make anything look unpretty, Cheryl Blossom.”

To bring the attention away from the blush on her cheeks, Cheryl raised an eyebrow and looked at the other dancer. “So you’re saying it’s me that’s pretty, huh? Not the dance?”

Toni grinned, getting as close to the girl as possible before wrapping her arms around Cheryl’s neck, and the ballerina did the same to her waist. Good thing about being the teacher’s favorite and a Prix de Lausanne contestant. Late night, empty studio practices.

Resting her forehead against Cheryl’s, Toni pecked her lips. “It's always been you.”

Cheryl giggled before her eyes shifted and she initiated another kiss. She pulled Toni even closer, and the pink haired girl easily complied, letting the redhead take the lead. Softly sighing when the ballerina tentatively nibbled her lower lip, Toni’s nails gently scraped Cheryl’s nape as the kiss intensified and she felt the hold on her waist tighten.

“You make everything beautiful as well, Toni Topaz.” Cheryl said as she pulled away, a flush on her cheeks and a grin on her face, gently pecking the other girl’s forehead. “My life, especially. Along with everything you dance to.”

Toni couldn’t say she was unused to receiving compliments. From when she started dancing, all her friends and every Serpent did was support her and let her know how good she was, so she would never feel like she was less than anyone just because of where she’s from, or what her family is. Still, hearing those words coming from Cheryl’s mouth made her heart soar, and brought those stupid butterflies in her stomach that every lame romantic movie mentioned.

God, she was so whipped.

It was then that Cheryl’s phone started ringing. And another smile made its way to Toni’s face as she heard the girl’s personalised ballet ringtone. How extra.

“It’s my brother.” Cheryl said, after she ran to her bag and checked who was calling. “He’s probably here already.” The girl pouted, which made Toni mimic her, knowing it was their time to say goodbye.

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then, princess.” She reached her arm out, so Cheryl could grab her hand and they could hug one more time.

“Or…” Cheryl started, suddenly seeming extremely nervous. “You could go outside with me and say hello to JayJay…?”

Despite finding adorable the way Cheryl called her brother, Toni’s first reaction was… well, actually, no reaction at all. It took her a moment to process the request. Cheryl wanted her to meet her brother. Her twin brother, the one she’d always heard of during their practices, or late night phone calls. She’d heard of how supportive he was, of how much he meant to Cheryl. And the redhead was choosing to share that part of her life with her. That big part of her life.

However, Toni’s lack of response was negatively interpreted by Cheryl, who quickly shook her head and nervously chuckled.

“O-or… we c-could jus… just…” She pulled Toni out of her thoughts as she started retreating the offer. “D-do it… uh… another day?”

“What? No!” Toni’s quick reaction caught her off guard, so Cheryl widened her eyes. “I mean, I’d love to go outside and say hi to your brother, Cher.” The dancer said, softening her voice and lacing one of her hands with Cheryl’s.

“Really?” The redhead asked with a smile so big that, even if Toni had any second thoughts about it - which she didn’t - they’d disappear.

“Of course! Let’s just grab our bags then we can go, okay?”

“Okay!”

With laced hands and smiles on their faces, both girls collected their stuff and left Studio B. Letting go of each others’ hands just so they could walk by the reception, Toni said a quick goodbye to Katy and Cheryl waved politely with a shy smile. As per usual, since the night they started training Cheryl’s contemporary solo for Prix de Lausanne, they were the last students to leave.

The only unusual thing was that, different from all the nights before, Cheryl and Toni left side by side, lacing their hands back together just as they opened the front door.

“JayJay doesn’t really know about… uh… us.” Cheryl said, as they exited the building and spotted the red Chevy Impala Jason was driving. “I thought it would be nice for you to meet each other before I tell him. Tonight.”

“Sure.” Now that they were getting closer, Toni was feeling a little bit nervous, so she couldn’t really elaborate a better response to that. Knowing how important Jason was for Cheryl, she wanted to make a good impression.

Maybe Cheryl picked up on Toni’s nervousness, from the way the pink haired girl was holding the redhead’s hand tighter, or maybe she just wanted to assure Toni, in case she was having doubts, because before they could reach the car, Cheryl smiled, squeezing her hand.

“He's gonna love you. I just know.” She said, and Toni wished that could have been enough to wash her nerves away. But she knew no amount of assurance would be enough to lighten the pressure of meeting Cheryl’s brother for the first time.

Before she could run, or throw up, or even stop Cheryl from pulling that freaking door handle, however, Toni heard.

“Jayjay, this is Toni, my friend from dance.” Cheryl’s voice somehow soothed her. Not enough to bring her voice back, but enough to make Toni raise her free hand and wave, with a smile on her face.

Jason, too, had a smile on his. A knowing one. One that showed that even if Cheryl hadn’t told him already, he knew. And he was fine with it.

“Nice to meet you, Toni.” He said, almost too cheerfully. Almost as if he was waiting for that day to come. “How's practice going? My sister mentioned, amongst many other things, you have a solo this season. Congratulations.”

Toni could laugh at the way Cheryl huffed by her side, and the fact that even at the dark parking lot, she knew the ballerina was blushing. So Cheryl had told Jason many things about her. Interesting.

“Thank you!” She said, instead. “Practice is going great, even though your sister seems to be the only one who’s not tired and eager for the break already.”

Jason laughed as they both heard Cheryl’s complain, with a roll of eyes. “Practice makes perfect.” She mumbled.

“Sure it does.” Toni said, looking at her with a fond grin, causing Cheryl to show her a sweet smile. They almost forgot the ballerina’s brother was around. Almost.

“So, it was really nice to meet you, Toni. Really nice to put a face to the name. But we have to go.” He said, pulling the girls out of their own little bubble. “Besides, it’s really cold, you two must be freezing out there."

Toni thought about telling him she was riding home on her motorcycle, so the cold was really nothing, but she had no idea how the boy would react to that information. One step at the time then, she could mention it another day.

“It was nice to meet you too, Jason.”

“Next time we see each other, let’s make sure we do it at a comfortable and warm table at Pop’s. How about that?”

“Sounds great!” Even if Toni had never really sat at a table at Pop’s. Ever. “See you tomorrow, Cher?” She asked, already knowing the answer, as the two girls finally let go of each others’ hands so Cheryl could enter the car.

“Of course, Toni!” Cheryl answered, a wide smile on her face before closing the passengers door.

Jason started the car and Toni waved. She couldn’t help but laugh to herself when she heard Jason saying “Of course, Toni.” in a loud, high pitched voice, teasingly, as he drove off while Cheryl playfully slapped his arm and yelled “Shut up!”

Toni realised just then, how much she loved that carefree side of Cheryl.

Riding back to Sunnyside, however, all Toni could think about was the huge step Cheryl had just taken by letting the contemporary dancer in, and introducing someone so important in her life to Toni. It kinda made her do the same.

Not that she hadn’t thought about that before, she only wanted Cheryl to be the one to take the first step. And Sweet Pea and Fangs already knew about the redhead - they'd even called her “Toni's girl” at the recital -, but she wanted the redhead to be more comfortable before she could suggest a meeting with the boys.

Well, Toni was just introduced to Cheryl’s brother, that was a sign already, right?

So the second thing she did when she arrived ‘home' - first thing was to check if her uncle was there or not - was pull her phone out of her bag and text the girl. She hoped it was really the best time for it.

_To Cher <3_   
_Loved meeting your brother, Cher._

**From Cher <3**   
_He loved meeting you too._

And, before Toni could text anything back, another one arrived.

**From Cher <3**   
_He knew. I didn’t even need to tell him. He just knew. And says he’s happy for me (: (: (: (: (: (:_

Toni chuckled at the amount of emojis Cheryl had sent. And, with a smile on her face, she replied:

_To Cher <3_   
_I’m happy for you (: Really, Cher! I’m so proud._

**From Cher <3**   
_Thanks, TT!_

Well, Toni guessed it was time.

_To Cher <3_   
_How about you meet my friends next time?_   
_You’ve met Fangs already at the recital, but you probably don’t remember._   
_They’re really cool, they’d love to meet you._

Toni was sure they would, even if she hadn’t discussed the idea with them yet. Besides, Fangs seemed fond of her already, and Sweet Pea would surely have a soft spot for the ballerina, she just knew.

**From Cher <3**   
_I remember_

That was the first reply Toni received, then, all she could see was three dots, appearing and disappearing on the screen. For a looooooong time, long enough for Toni to reconsider.

Maybe it wasn’t the time yet. Cheryl’s so shy, she was probably scared she wouldn’t be able to say anything. It’s one thing for Toni to meet the girl’s brother, because it’s someone the she’s already comfortable with. But asking her to meet two strangers, and doing that throughTHROUGH TEXT on top of it all… Maybe it wasn’t a good move.

It wasn’t, for sure. However, when Toni was ready to send another message telling Cheryl to forget it, another text came.

**From Cher <3**   
_It will be nice to meet your friends TT. Maybe we could do it before winter break…?_

-

One could say Toni was quite nervous. One could even say that no matter how lovely and beautiful Cheryl looked that night - as she always did -, Toni’s nerves didn’t really fade.

Was it because that was the night Cheryl’s meeting the boys? For sure, although the boys weren’t really the problem. More like the situation itself. Because Cheryl didn’t want to meet them outside the dance studio, like the meeting with Jason occurred. Not even a set up meeting at that Pop’s place the Southsider always heard the dancers talk about. No, the redhead, in what Toni most definitely knew to be an act of bravery, had requested to meet them on the Southside, in order to get to know the place Toni grew up in better - her words, not Toni’s -.

And to say that didn’t worry Toni was a lie. She had ranked all the ways things could go wrong the night before. However, as she was about to tell Cheryl she thought it was better for them to change the plans, the other girl’s smile and excitement caught her off guard.

“So you really want to do this?” Toni asked, for what could be the tenth time, as they exited the studio that night - the last students, as usual - and walked towards Sweet Pea’s truck. Well, Sweet Pea’s dad’s truck.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Cheryl wrapped her arms around herself to protect her trembling frame from the cold wind. She looked at Toni with a grin and an arched eyebrow.

“Well, the Southside is not much of a place for sightseeing.” Toni said, only half joking. And even though she wanted to add the fact that Cheryl also seemed quite hesitant when the topic of meeting Toni’s friends came up that day through text, and choosing to meet them in an unfamiliar place could add up an unnecessary amount of pressure, Toni decided not to.

“It is the place where you grew up, though.” The ballerina said, not as loud or confident as before, and Toni almost cursed herself for bringing her excitement down. “That way I can know more about you.” She added, in a low voice, almost only to herself.

“How about you just ask?” Toni asked with a dry laugh when they reached the truck. The passenger’s door needed a forceful swing to be opened, so she took it upon herself to do it for Cheryl.

“Nice try. But I would still like to go to the Southside and meet your friends.”

Toni shrugged with a grimace, then closed the door and ran to the driver’s side. “It was worth a shot.” She muttered.

“Where are we going, by the way?” Cheryl asked, curiously, when Toni sat down and started the car. “And why are we not on your motorcycle?”

Toni let out a loud laugh, which caused Cheryl to laugh at her. “You're the one who told me motorcycles are dangerous, remember?”

“Yes. You, however, did say you were careful.”

It’s not like Toni had lied. Only… it’s a matter of point of view.

Besides, even if the contemporary dancer were the most careful person in the world, she wouldn’t risk hurting Cheryl right before Prix de Lausanne, in two months. Funny, though, how she was quick to risk scaring the ballerina away by taking her to the most dangerous place in town, which also happened to be the place where Toni was raised.

“You're not ready yet, little bug.” Toni joked, causing Cheryl to scrunch up her nose and let out a huff, to which Toni chuckled. “Also, I’m taking you to the Whyte Wyrm. It’s our hang out spot.”

By ‘our’ Toni meant ‘every Serpent in the area’s’, but she was still too cautious when mentioning her family to Cheryl. Even if, half the time the redhead seemed eager to know more, and the other half she caught on to Toni's hesitancy in carrying on with the topic and dropped the conversation. Even if Toni was just driving them to the place where most of them get together.

It’s not like Toni was ashamed of her upbringing, or the gang she’s part of by blood. It’s just… looking at Cheryl, all delicate and princess-like… it’s hard to picture the two worlds colliding. She didn’t even need to imagine much, since it would happen sooner than she’d thought.

“So, it’s like a Pop’s then?”

“Well…” Toni grimaced. “I've never been to Pop’s, but I can assure you it’s nothing like that.”

For starters, in a place like Pop’s, Cheryl would fit right in.

She just hoped the girl would, at least, get along with the boys.

-

As predicted, Cheryl looked like a fish out of water when they walked inside the Wyrm. It didn’t really help that all the eyes turned to them as soon as the first Serpent spotted Toni with an unknown girl by her side. Then, Cheryl only seemed to be getting smaller each step they took towards the bar, not an ounce of excitement left in her pale face.

Toni squeezed her hand, bringing her a bit closer.

“They’re not gonna hurt you.” She said, seeing Cheryl eyebrows instantly furrow in confusion.

“Of course they aren’t.” Cheryl whispered, and Toni couldn’t quite explain the relief she felt hearing those words.

The relief of realising that Cheryl wasn’t scared because she was in a room full of Serpents, she was just nervous because she was in a room full of strangers. Toni could kiss her, if she didn’t know it would bring even more attention to them.

“There they are!” Toni heard Fangs’ loud voice when she approached the bar with Cheryl by her side. “Sweet Pea betted twenty bucks you’d back down and not show up. He’s asking F.P for the money now.”

Fangs Fogarty, one of Toni’s best friends, stood behind the counter, an apron on his waist, a piece of fabric on his shoulder, and a wide smile on his face. He looked at Cheryl and the smile grew even wider.

“Hi, Cheryl.”

Cheryl’s face turned into what Toni could call a nervous grin and she waved. Both Toni and Fangs saw her mouth a “hi" after a few seconds of expectation, but none of them actually heard the word.

Toni freed their laced hands to place it around Cheryl’s waist, bringing her closer with a smile. ‘You're doing great!’ She wanted to say, but restrained herself and only placed a quick kiss on the girl’s red cheek.

Fangs, the angel that he was, didn’t quite seem to mind Cheryl’s lack of words, and only kept blabbering about how nice it was to finally meet her officially. He didn’t even wait for any of the girls to respond before complimenting Cheryl’s performance that day at the recital and mentioning how talented she was. Toni could even feel the girl in her arms relax.

It was when Fangs was about to start asking questions, to which Toni wasn’t quite sure Cheryl would offer an answer, that Sweet Pea came rushing from the back of the room, placing a twenty dollar bill in Fangs' hand with a grunt. He stood next to Fangs, also behind the bar, looking at Toni with a raised eyebrow, then diverting his eyes to the redhead by her side.

He looked at Cheryl up and down, scrutinising. And Toni knew he meant no harm, and also knew that was a usual thing for him to do when meeting new people. It didn’t mean that it wasn’t slightly intimidating from the perspective of the person being looked at that way.

And the last thing they needed was for Cheryl to be even more intimidated.

“Sweet Pea, this is Cheryl.” Toni introduced then, since the boy wasn’t quite making an effort to say anything, and she was sure Cheryl wouldn’t be the one to do so.

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Cheryl.” He said, in a way that Toni’d never heard him sound so polite before.

Cheryl, on the other hand, couldn’t really do anything but stare at him, unable to even mouth an answer. She seemed frozen, intimidated by the tall boy standing in front of her. Well, if anything, it made more sense for Cheryl to feel that way in the presence of Sweet Pea than Fangs. If Toni wasn’t still holding the girl’s waist, she was sure the ballerina would be bolting out of there, from how nervous she looked now that Sweet Pea was around.

So it actually came as a surprise to her when Cheryl hesitantly reached out her hand, offering it as a greeting. To which Sweet Pea cautiously took, eyeing her with a raised eyebrow in suspicion before shaking the girl’s hand.

“So… you play darts?” He asked, a grin on his face.

Yeah, they’d probably get along just fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, here it is (and I apologize for eventual grammar or vocabulary mistakes) :)
> 
> also, I'm not making promises on updates anymore, it's just pointless lol I'm just gonna promise that I'll finish this story, no matter how long it takes (I do hope it doesn't take that long, though)!
> 
> I'm (kinda) back to Twitter: @bckwrds101


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